cool ranch spaghetti

make bad decisions

[cool ranch spaghetti @totallyranch]

Gas is short for gasoline

[cool ranch spaghetti @totallyranch]

Life’s like a van full of shrimp. Where did these shrimp come from? Who’s van is this? I’m not paying for all these shrimp. They’re not even cooked, what am I supposed to do with these things? I don’t care what your manager told you, these aren’t mine I’m not paying for this

[cool ranch spaghetti @totallyranch]

“(feat. Kid Rock)”

[cool ranch spaghetti @totallyranch]

Through the power of CHRIST ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE

[cool ranch spaghetti @totallyranch]

Yeah cool let’s never double check our work ever again and just keep passing this ticket back and forth this is the correct way to do this I’m having a lot of fun

[cool ranch spaghetti @totallyranch]

@actualmikeg

[cool ranch spaghetti @totallyranch]

I feel like I have to say “get the fuck away from me” more often than I should

[cool ranch spaghetti @totallyranch]

Actually fuck that. Penne can suck a dick. Don’t fuck with penne

[cool ranch spaghetti @totallyranch]

Penne is just ok

[cool ranch spaghetti @totallyranch]

Rigatoni and Fusilli get honorable mentions, like if someone was comin up on ya I probably wouldn’t say shit but you alright