jo

[tell that mick he just made my lyss @lysstory]

the absolute worst guy u know is gonna dress like this for halloween this year btw

[Minda Haas Kuhlmann @minda33]

can somebody please explain to me why i just watched this 59 times

[Caitlin @caithuls]

What I like about myself is that when I use qtips in my ears it’s good actually. They said for me it’s good and fine

[one of ur hoes @miliondollameat]

doctor: u got dementia

me: i don't remember asking u a goddamn thing

[pastoral imbecile @finnegans_vape]

Commenting ‘nightmare blunt rotation’ on some family’s Christmas photos on Facebook

[Duncan Trussell @duncantrussell]

Marijuana is legal in 18 states, The Webb space telescope is about stare into God’s asshole, you can get legal prescription ketamine spray, and the government is about to have a public hearing on UFOs.

[Andrew Huang @andrewhuang]

Pro tip! If you’re struggling with mixing your kick drum, just remember that eventually the earth will be swallowed by the sun

[Jag Ubani @Jag_ubani]

Iphone users: Holds down an app to delete it

The rest of the apps:

[Bridget Phetasy @BridgetPhetasy]

We live in era of crybabies.

[Jimmy Tatro @JimmyTatro]

If I see one more post about Euphoria I swear to god I will continue not watching it

[David Carson @PDPJ]

St. Louis never disappoints. Everywhere was sold out of sleds so they grab some dumpster covers and went sledding at Art Hill. #stlwx @stltoday for all the St. Louis snow stories

[Vinny Thomas @vinn_ayy]

I miss when commercials were just a man yelling about a new sponge at 4am

[Rob the Geek (gay pride emoji) @rob_thegeek]

My dog has no idea that I pay an extra $50 a month in rent for her to live here and it makes me sick

[ferry @icecoldnovember]

Wuhan

[Bugle Boy Gene @hechoenflorida]

😭😭😭

[nard @avantnard]

this was one of the funniest things i’ve ever seen