Tricia

“I know clams” something I said once and now I am held to this standard

[Tricia @tricia_alias]

My spirit animal is a high maintenance tropical aquarium fish that needs to be kept at 75-85° & if it doesn't get enough attention it'll die

[Tricia @tricia_alias]

I'm running low on dopamine, when is trump's mugshot coming out?

[lj 🌼 hubris king @newtguzzler]

When I die I want to be cremated but at my funeral there will be an open casket with a Muppet version of me.

[Jesse Case @jessecase]

This will break Etsy

[Saneer • @Saneeero]

you’re in her dms but she’s in my bed and we’re taking online quizzes in order to figure out if either of us have autism

[Ann Coulter @AnnCoulter]

COMPROMISE SOLUTION ON ABORTION!

Ban abortion for registered Republicans only.

[Tricia @tricia_alias]

Wow this did not age well, cruel and heartless is spot on #VanderpumpRules

[Raquel Leviss @RaquelLeviss]

Is this what twitter is for?

[Tricia @tricia_alias]

Joe and Melissa are insufferable and they're ruining this season of #RHONJ

[Tricia @tricia_alias]

Did the one weird green potato chip in the bag stop existing?

[Tricia @tricia_alias]

Is sharpening a knife like sharpening a pencil or does your knife stay the same size forever?

[Dionne Warwick @dionnewarwick]

I will be dating Pete Davidson next.

[Geoff Tice @GeoffreyTice]

People keep asking if my wife and I know the sex of our baby yet and I keep saying we’re having a woman and everyone really hates that.

[Goodable @Goodable]

The Brooklyn Public Library has announced that any teenager in America is now eligible for a Brooklyn Public Library card.

Teens can sign out ebooks + audiobooks from wherever they live.

The move is designed to combat censorship, with some titles listed as "always available."

[Rishi Bagree @rishibagree]

@Delta Wuhan

[Ben Rosen @ben_rosen]

*elton john tiny dancer voice*

[Tricia @tricia_alias]

Me: *struggling to turn a Covid patient by myself cause lift team doesn't go into isolation rooms*

CDC: you can do it put your back into it

[People @people]

Betty White Reveals Her Secrets to a Happy Life at 100: 'I'm So Lucky to Be in Such Good Health' https://t.co/JlWhdBsZyN

[Sarah J. Hass @tacko_belle]

credit card chip machines are like:

- DO NOT remove your card
- DO NOT - hey look at me - DO NOT remove your card
- take out your card immediately or I’m burning this place to the ground

[brent @murrman5]

sometimes self care is choosing to exercise other times its ignoring that there was something crunchy in your banana

[brent @murrman5]

[son on his wedding day] dad what’s the best part of marriage?
[thinking about how there’s always bananas in the house] her smile