TSA America

Your security. Our people, processes and technology. Bureaucratic parody account.

[Rhian Gardiner @Rhizzar]

@TSAAmerica is it a coincidence the guy in the backgrounds t-shirt reads 100 cold cas?

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

Affirmative @Sternenruferin - we ship our training DVD's authored by @mishacollins internationally. Go to: http://t.co/cr3MahiSXl

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

Tune into our @TSAAmerica blog to see how we're just like you! http://t.co/2E7YAdi85T

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

Why do we have long lines at checkpoints? Lines makes us look wildly popular and hard to get into. Off-duty bouncer:

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

.@kristal350 come fly with us and you can be the first to try it out.

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

.@ladyriven not to disclose our classified methods, but there is no "don't" in device testing. We thoroughly test everything on passengers.

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

We don't always know what our security devices actually "do", but that doesn't stop us from liberally using them.

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

Guess who’s closely watching the monitors when u go through a full-body imaging scanner... we scrutinize everything.

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

.@EulogyForKurt yes we ship training manuals to Finland. Our Dir. Of Training has been known to hand deliver. http://t.co/LuSQbQmNhL

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

.@justhere4misha the badge provides u with fast track screening. Wear it at all airports - just not on the wrong lapel or u will be "marked"

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

This agent is observing an aggressive "in testing" screening method. We test on real passengers to keep it authentic.

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

Our Agents are like finely tuned cutting-edge machines - ever watchful and ready for suspect passengers and items.

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

Why do we YELL "opt out?" We want to share with everyone that you've decided you'd be much happier if we touched you versus a cold machine.

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

This Agent is currently flunking our "emotions" class.

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

Our Agents are not emotionless automatons. We train them to express pseudo feelings when applicable. Our star pupil:

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

Our agents are trained in operating a variety of screening technologies. Sonograms included. http://t.co/cr3MahiSXl

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

And that @fourisgreen is exactly why we do it. Your handle has been noted, however, as clearly you merit further scrutiny. Happy travels.

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

Our screening processes are not a joke. In fact we tag laughter as a potential concealment of guilt. Clear example:

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

If we ask you for your ID more than once, it's not illogical. We are just confirming you haven't "changed" since the last checkpoint.

[TSA America @TSAAmerica]

"Opting out" does not mean you forgo your rights as a passenger. It just means those rights will be reinterpreted. For security purposes.