Pete O’ Hanlon

These words are my own, from my heart flow.

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

@LeighState Udon’t

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

@lordfridayland Never has the road been hit so hard

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

Customer came back in saying that a bag of Epsom salt he’d bought ‘tasted like shite’.
My brother in Christ (who you’re about to meet) that stuff is for the bath.

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

I’ll never forget the first time I time travelled, remember it like it was tomorrow.

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

This is Mojo Jojo’s mojo dojo casa house.

#barbie #mojodojocasahouse

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

@TheFragiIe This was from my Netflix special ‘RePeteToire’.

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

Customer *lifting spoon out of container, clearly labelled ‘dirty’, full of already used scoops and spoons which couldn’t possibly be misconstrued as the place to get a fresh, clean spoon*: ‘ehhh excuse me? This spoon is dirty? I don’t really fancy using dirty utensils??’

Me: 👍

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

Does this SAG-AFTRA strike mean I have to stop acting the maggot?

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

Started watching ‘Black Mirror’ and it’s just ‘Grizzly Tales For Gruesome Kids: Adult Version’.

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

@PeterRugman @beachboysmoment @MikeLoveOFCL Finger on the pulse and a hand on the mic. They’re all none the Budweiser!
‘Wouldn’t It Be Nice’ as Mike sang on a little known stupendous beat record, ‘Pet Sounds’! Haha 🐐😂

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

Tricky TV reboot looks dark af, new direction for CITV, excited. Glad Mulhern’s getting another crack at the whip.

[DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm]

First look at Dane DeHaan in ‘OPPENHEIMER’.

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

Customer bought 4 bamboo toothbrushes and said ‘I change toothbrush every night. You’ve to change them every 3 months anyway so it’s the same difference.’

Lady, it most certainly is not.

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

Person who’s never smoked before buying RAW papers: hi can I buy a packet of

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

Just saw Indiana Jones and The Dial Of Destiny in the cinema with my dad.

Whatever its failings, of which there were structurally many, it doesn’t take away from the fact that I got to go see an Indiana Jones film in the cinema with my dad.

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

@PeterRugman

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

@PeterRugman @MikeLoveOFCL I wish @MikeLoveOFCL would show us some ‘love and mercy’ and respond to us! Whoopseedandelion Mike didn’t make that song, but also neither did I. Equals pequals? Thanks @MikeLoveOFCL

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

Camp Rock and Jaws were released on the same day 33 years apart.
One changed cinema forever, and the other has a big silly shark in it.

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

Shakespearean plays, Lynchian nightmares and

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

My friend serving someone named ‘Graham Nash’: you have the exact same name as a very famous musician.

Man with the same name as Graham Nash: oh really, who?

Friend: 😐

[Pete O’ Hanlon @tweetohanlon]

New York rn