Jacob Hansen

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@NYCPBA This was found to be false. Will you be removing or amending this post, or did you plan on leaving it up to be inflammatory and untruthful? @shakeshack @NYPDDetectives @BilldeBlasio

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@AldermanSpiker if you're not breaking the law until the declaration occurs, there should be fair warning that you will be breaking the law. It's not a warning of a warning. It's a warning you might break the law.

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@SenChrisLarson @GovEvers Oooo the Republicans won't like this. That money is supposed to be going to the health insurance companies! Most of their CEOs aren't even billionaires.

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

.@SenRonJohnson Thank you for being opposed to a Federal bailout for WI! @ScottWalker did such a terrible job for those 8 years. I've rarely seen a governor mismanage a state like that! We don't deserve help and I'd hate for @GovEvers to get credit! #COVIDー19 @SenChrisLarson

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@RandPaul Hey! Now you're catching on.

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@WWE You guys should put other wrestlers in the seats. Even if they have matches. At least they can all heckle each other!

Either that or a sitcom style "chant track" 😅

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@MilwaukeePolice @CityofMKE any plans to stop enforcing parking rules now that I'm unemployed, stuck at home and have zero interest in moving my car every 2 hours?

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@jonlajoiecomedy with marijuana becoming legal very soon in Illinois, are there plans to open a THC and CBD EBDBBNB?

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@RideMCTS Thank you. It's rare I take the 14 at that time, and I was very surprised with how I was treated.

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@RideMCTS your driver on bus #5172 Route 14 right now is very rude. After blowing by a scheduled stop, she proceeded to try to blame me after I had to sprint a block to catch it at a red light.

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@realDonaldTrump I'd be embarrassed if half the people I knew hated me.

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@realDonaldTrump Why was it creepily sped up when Gentleman Schiff was talking?

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@CNN Can we get a comparison of the number of Democratic government employees versus Republican government employees found guilty of crimes so far this year?

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@GoBNNS @scottkelly1593 @DuvalMagic I second this. I rarely try new guns because swapping them in the menu is too aggravating. So I'm sure I've missed out on some cool stuff along the way.

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@DuvalMagic And a golden key or two...

[WeirdFactsMilwaukee @WeirdFactsMKE]

A colony of nearly 350 #Milwaukee smokers was found huddling for warmth in the 4th floor of the @Chase Tower parking structure today. @UWM researchers noted striking similarities in hierarchy and group organization between the smokers and colonies of King Penguins.

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@TheDavidZucker when you guys wrote The Naked Gun, did you think about how the expired food scene would get more funny with time? 1982 was a very long time ago, now.

Also, my mom and dad apparently went to high school with you guys at Central!

[David Zucker @TheDavidZucker]

Green Bay announces it still plans to name a city street after fired coach Mike McCarthy. But reportedly it’s now a dead end one.

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@LastWeekTonight very disappointed in The Wax and the Furious sketch. I was positive it was going to be a straight to DVD movie only available at the last Blockbuster... I would make that trip to Bend, Oregon.

[Jacob Hansen @twerploaf]

@thegrandtour I don't want to come off as callous, but did @RichardHammond crash because he couldn't reach the brakes :(