luca ꩜

npd + bipolar || tw! sh,ed,drug twt || i love alt music, cats, & clowns! (+ more) c: ifb 14+ i love my bf muah!

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

when i see my coworker imma ask to buy shrooms from her‼️ then after that i wanna see if i can get ma hands on adderall and mdma :3

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

@d1rtyxr3d your dad has been pissing me off SOO much lately. always looking for ways to lecture you abt responsibility yet he cant even take care of a helpless animal?? not only is he lazy but he’s a piece of shit for not doing something abt a situation that has been effecting many.

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

ive had two lyft drivers ask me where i work and when i describe what i do (a lot of heavy lifting) they mention with concern that im very small to be having that sort of job and it’s kinda validating bc ive been feel so big lately

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

i hate body dysmorphia sm.

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

this job has been making me lose so much weight unintentionally it’s crazy..at some point i stopped tracking what i was eating bc all i could think abt was having enough fuel to get me through work but wow am i nearing the lowest weight i used to be…

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

im shitting bricks i plan on sneaking out tmr but the thing is my family is gonna know im out they’ll probably yell and chase after me and then who knows what will be waiting for me when i get home 😭🙏

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

@d1rtyxr3d had the nerve to call you useless before you had a job yet look at him. even before that, you still did more than he ever did for you and your house. fuck him

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

aaaaaand my mom takes half of my paycheck yet again 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

god this work life is miserable. not worse than school but fuck..wdym this is my life from now on..I HATE THIS!!

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

my parents will always minimize any accomplish i make and will try to set me up for failure every single damn fucking time. at what age will they finally stop trying to control me

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

my brother told my mom he can tell that im heartless and theres sumthing deeply wrong with me. he didnt mean to insult me theres just no other way to put it yk? at most i just feel validated that ppl can tell theres sumthing off with me even when trying to mask

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

work is fun especially with ruby and our new friend but fawk..it feels so physically draining + im on my period 😞 just two more days after today 🫩

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

i dont wanna go to work today argh…

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

also i couldnt have made it more obvious that i was self conscious bc i started frantically apologizing saying “im so sorry for being heavy” and he look genuinely confused & said “what? youre not heavy at all”

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

yesterday my coworker picked me up bridal style and i got really scared bc i feel like im heavy but when he put me down he asked “what are you like 90 or 100 lbs?” IM SCREAMING IN JOY.

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

yesterday my coworker picked me up bridal style and i got really scared bc i feel like im heavy but when he put me down he asked “what are you like 90 or 100 lbs?” IM SCREAMING IN JOY.

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

i think my coworker is trying to kiss me but i also cant believe it so im trying to convince myself im just going crazy especially bc he knows i have a bf but sigh…why must this happen to me

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

being fat ruins so many of my outfits im crashing out 🤣🤣🤣

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

now with a job, i hope to finally get the mental help that i need

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

@Tropical_Sploon IVE BEEN INFECTED SPLOON ITS STILL ME TRUST (thank you im gonna suffer but at least i’ll be getting a bag 💔)

[luca ꩜ @twilucaa]

bro im employed what…