mace

💖🪩🍋🩰🤸🏻‍♀️💌🧑🏼‍⚕️🍸🏇🏽🎞️💋

[mace @twmsxo]

genuinely such a nice horse, I have no idea how I got so lucky with him. 0 post track rides, no PPE, $4500 cash on the shed row & going off a feeling deep down that I was making the right decision. best 1 of my life 🤍 smart as a whip and so handsome my baby

[Ｈ ｅ ｒ ｏ @ReLLoO]

My ex taught me you've definitely got to worry about the ugly ones too

[♰ @heavens_sickest]

nobody will hurt u more than a mid dude who wanted u first

[fenlon @1fenlon]

Television is very excited for her first Autumn. she's already been practicing her Halloween posture for next month

[Daniel @growing_daniel]

Jesus was a carpenter which means for a split second when they handed him his cross he probably clocked it and was like hmmm cedar

[CARRI🎀 @_carrisherrie]

Do you know how horrible of a person a man is when his shit ain’t together????

[桃山 @s_t_melon]

この帽子にはファスナー付きの小さなポケットがついている。
昔はこのポケットに、女性といざという時のためにコンドー❤を忍ばせていた。
今は何を？
リウマチの薬が入っている😅
年を取るとはこういうことだ。

[ky @jilroberts]

What the hell was i on in 24. I don’t remember any of this shit

[HARLEY SPICE @Harleyspice_]

I found my wedding dress at Goodwill for $8. I was fixing a loose thread at home when I felt something crinkly inside the lining. I thought it was just extra padding, but it was a tiny pocket sewn shut. I carefully opened it and there was $100 folded inside a note. The note said: "To the next bride who wears this dress - first year is tough, but worth it. Dinner on us. 54 years together - M & J

[mace @twmsxo]

My ex 😭😭😭

[star6!*☆ @seanecd]

Exosted 😭🕊️

[Skyler Higley @skyler_higley]

that guy who died from the penis enlargement. in Heaven does he have his original small penis or does he take the enhanced penis with him

[layah @superstarlayyy]

nggas will do the worst shi ever & then tell you they dont know why they did it

[miz irri @miz_irritating]

genie: you have three wishes

me: i wish my body tea

genie: you still have three wishes henny

me: yess sis gag it

[tara @hustlehard6795]

Blessed because only 26 girls can say
they've had my man

[r @6ffside]

this is what baseball is about.

[mace @twmsxo]

💖💖🥹🥹🌷🌷🤸🏼🤸🏼

[𝓪𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓪 ꕤ 𑣿 @locketXO]

just asked my situationship if i should dye my hair as if he gives a flying fuck

[tasman @lildorothy_]

(me as a car salesman) if you don’t buy this car right now i will kill myself

[j😵line @jojcap]

me + my gf 😙

[tijana ⊹ ✭ . ݁˖ @endofwanting]

yeah these 4 might be my favs so far