Ensign Obvious the parody account

The worst at explaining things, the best at enjoying the people who do it well.

It's actually me Elon, using this as a way to find out what grimes is doing

[Ensign Obvious the parody account @uMadeThis]

Reading comments in the news threads

[Emma Vigeland @EmmaVigeland]

Case closed lol

[Jejune The Annihilator @Midnight_JJ0]

Katie Gluek, the NYT hack who wrote the smear piece on Graham Platner, has parents who are *Israeli settlers* in the West Bank. As usual, the Israel lobby is demonizing a candidate b/c he's dared to criticize Israel. Many will be duped by these reprehensible tactics as usual

[Lindsay Ballant @lindsayballant]

This is one of the two reporters bylined on the Platner story, fwiw

[barbarism critic @barbarismcrit]

Democrats will of course not use this to their advantage

[Zaid Jilani @ZaidJilani]

Zohran Mamdani gets 10,000 questions a day about antisemitism when he’s never harmed a single Jewish person in any way.

Meanwhile many of the people accusing him support the Jewish version of the Ku Klu Klan.

[Ensign Obvious the parody account @uMadeThis]

Joe, you should have let your boy post during the election

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

@SoundDobad I know this may sound petty, but I can’t stand it when people put photoshop a meth pipe in my mouth. A crack pipe doesn’t have that little bowl at the end. This is why we can’t trust AI. Please make the appropriate edit. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

[Cindy Begel @CindyBegel]

#newbies NBC has opened submissions on its TV writing program. No application fee. You need 2 original pilots of the same basic type, a resume, & 2 personal essays of 400 words apiece. They accept submissions until June 21. Check out NBCU's many programs!
https://t.co/bf7O96ybjr

[Clarence Thomas the Tank Engine @TheRealJChubby]

This shit is killing me man. The way they are just like "oh, oops, let me just get out of my car" like it's not absolutely insane that this happened.

[Lionel Hutz, Tesla Attorney General @Gimply32]

TRUMP HAS CANCELLED ALL MORTGAGES & RENT! Send this vid to your bank or landlord to have all debts wiped clean!

[Ensign Obvious the parody account @uMadeThis]

@GarlicCorgi Whoever owns Budweiser now

[Mehdi Hasan @mehdirhasan]

Sometimes, you don’t hate the bias of the editors at the New York Times enough.

The reporters rightly relegated this guilt-by-association cleric stuff to the 9th paragraph of their piece but the editor made sure it in was the dek of the piece itself on this historic night - above any mention of him treating 9/11 victims, saving Tammy Duckworth’s life, or volunteering to save lives in Gaza.

[Fifty Shades of Whey @davenewworld_2]

"At the time of the bankruptcy filing, Georgia-Pacific faced 64,000 lawsuits alleging that the company's drywall, wallboard, plaster and other construction materials contained asbestos and caused cancer....cancer victims argued that Bestwall was abusing U.S. bankruptcy law to prevent them from trying their cases in other courts, without offering any real path to settling the cases in bankruptcy."

https://t.co/DuTs5Ctumt

[Fifty Shades of Whey @davenewworld_2]

The Supreme Court refused to hear a challenge to the "Texas two-step," letting corporations fraudulently use bankruptcy court to quarantine mass injury claims while the profitable parent company keeps operating.

Georgia-Pacific is a massive building materials manufacturer that shifted asbestos liabilities into a separate corporate entity, and then filed for "bankruptcy," which paused cancer victims' lawsuits and preserved their power and profits.

These companies are not meaningfully broke... but they use bankruptcy as a weapon against their victims. It's ridiculous. Our nation's highest court is clearly not a neutral entity if they won't even look at this obvious financial fraud doing significant harm to innocent Americans.

[Ensign Obvious the parody account @uMadeThis]

The only qualm I could conceive is this atrophies whatever talent I gained making dumplings from scratch but I also like having more free time, so...

[Ensign Obvious the parody account @uMadeThis]

Honestly this is how I feel as well mostly because up in VT the selection was slim in the 2010s and we'd have to make weekend trips to Boston to fill in the gap. It's gotten much better now thanks to Asian grocers making money from Westerners' interest.

[Betsey @Betsycashmoney]

I despise woke food discourse.

I'm glad white people love Asian food!
They are the reason my Asian mom in the Midwest now has an H-Mart!!!!

I don't think yall realize how hard it used to be for Asians to find Asian food in much of the country, especially outside the West Coast!

[Clarence Thomas the Tank Engine @TheRealJChubby]

It's a good thing inflation is low and very manageable then!

[Ensign Obvious the parody account @uMadeThis]

@RadishHarmers Counterpoint: what if I get amnesia and get to enjoy my favorite show again

[Ensign Obvious the parody account @uMadeThis]

@GrahamSig Takis = spices?

[Jesus Freakin Congress @TheJFreakinC]

🚨BREAKING: Right-wing streamer Cam Higby was caught on video walking up to a group of protesters and pepper spraying multiple people, outside the Newark ICE Facility.

Then, as people reacted to being sprayed, an armed man pulled him away, telling him, “It’s not worth it… it’s time to go.”

Last time I checked… walking up to a group of people and spraying them with a chemical irritant is commonly charged as assault or battery.

And then, after spraying the crowd, the video show Higby, and the armed man, running into the ICE facility while agents allowed them inside.

Imagine the outrage if a left-wing activist walked up to a group of conservatives, pepper sprayed them, and then disappeared behind federal gates.

The headlines would never stop.

The law is supposed to apply equally to everyone.

[Anvina Gabitova @AnvinaGabitova]

@BladeoftheS It'll start off super cheap. Just a small subscription. Then eventually crank it up once most people have one.

"You will own nothing and you will he happy"