Maxim from Moscow

Native russian man. Tweet in English only.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

This is a very cheap russian vine at a discount store in Moscow. 1 litre ~ USD 1.25. 😬 Russian middle class prefer not to buy it.
Interesting fact — we ironically call these types of vine "la packet". It sounds like a natural french. 😂
"Packet" (RU) = "Mutilayer carton"

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

@TansuYegen It's false.
The illusions are not suitable for all thee people. Their point of view is wrong.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

I visited an exhibition several weeks ago. This painting has impressed me a lot. Kliment Redko "Motherhood" 1928.
There are a large number of senses here. Mother's love, violation of personal boundaries, childhood trauma, Oedipus complex etc.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

In these situations I do the same (I mean white guy's actions).

[RadioGenoa @RadioGenoa]

Short civic education lesson.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

@Rainmaker1973 It looks like a kind of typical spaghetti western movie scene.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

@Thebestfigen 30-24=6
9/3=3
6х3=18

18

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

Old russian anecdote.
The moose with large balls was walking proudly through the forest. He got his scrotum caught in the bushes and...🤬
He came out onto a clearing where a cow was grazing.
“What's your name?”
“I'm "Big Udder". Who are you?”
“I'm a moose. Just a moose...” 😭

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

@nocontextmemes Btw, it's a useful training for prostate.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

@gunsnrosesgirl3 You need to close/open your eyes in a special speed to see this effect in reality. This footage is edited. Sure.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

Do you have any russian friends? It's good idea — write them 9/03 "I wish you a happy Saint Shufutin's day!"
If you are going to congratulate orally, the correct pronunciation is: "Show Four Teens".
It's a popular russian meme, it will be funny to hear it from non-russian.
😂😂

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

@frt_massage_ Excuse me — but what does your comment have to do with my tweet?

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

It's obvious that to teach a man without thumbs to play piano is the hardest thing. The music teacher won't be happy to work with such a student.
When my wife says me "Maxim, do you want to take some classes of massage?" I answer "Nobody could teach me".

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

Russians are divided into 2 groups - some prefer okroshka with kvass, others - with kefir (fermented milk drink). And nobody could understand the opposite point of view. Just like elephants and donkeys in America. 😁
As for me, I like okroshka with kvass, but I can use kefir too.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

The most unusual dishes of Russian cuisine is okroshka.
It is fresh vegetables, herbs, eggs and meat poured over cold kvass.
Foreigners call it “soup with cola”, it's very unusual to eat it for the first time.
But for us it's a pleasure to eat cold okroshka in the summer heat.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

@jacksonhinkle @WornhamHelen Silly useless tweets.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

It's really cool — as I notice, this building has been built by giant men (see the middle if the footage), but little dwarfs finished the process.
😁

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

Now it's watermelon season in Moscow.
My wife likes them very much and eats with pleasure. But I eat a couple of slices - and that's enough for me. If I eat any more - I have an unpleasant feeling, as if I were being inflated like a soccer ball.🤮⚽
Do you like watermelon?

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

@PhaedraXTeddy @Kasejacoper It's fake

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

I once had to chase bums off the lawn under my wife's office window. You can't guess what their arguments were.
1) Only we sit here, we don't let anyone else in.
2) We clean up after ourselves.
I chased them away anyway. But the “only we sit here” argument is classy, I think.😁

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

Let's say you don't like this design idea. Then the strategy should be to ask the staff where the women's restroom is. And if every fifth woman does that, the staff will get fucked up and make the management repaint the doors.

[The Figen @TheFigen_]

This is so rude! 😂

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

A popular joke about Pushkin is that he was the first Russian rapper.

It's obvious that:
1) Pushkin had African roots.
2) He wrote cheeky rhymes.
3) He died in a gunfight.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

Alexander Pushkin (1799-1837) was a Russian poet who had a huge influence on Russian poetry. Like Shakespeare in England.
His great-grandfather was from Ethiopia, so he is sometimes jokingly referred to as "the African poet".
Pushkin was scandalous, and eventually died in a duel.

[Maxim from Moscow @uir451]

Pushkin had a very memorable appearance, his image is easily recognizable, he is very easy to parody on stage (like Lincoln in the US). If a Russian guy has curly hair, it is very likely that his nickname will be Pushkin.