With one last limerick I’m resignin’
From all strike-related fun rhymin’
The votes have been cast.
Fair Deal, here at last
Please pass me my glass to put wine in.
#umfa2021#umfastrike
It’s hard to know where to begin.
How will we move on if we win?
For one month my life
Was our labour strife
And rhyming insults at admin.
#umfa2021#umfastrike
Fair Deal, sweet Fair Deal is that you?
You were harder to find than we knew.
We waited and watched
You’re like the Sasquatch
You’re like bargaining’s Polkaroo!
#umfa2021#umfastrike
It is with pride UMFA rejects
The clear and the present effects
Of dreadful admin
Whose prominent sin
Is dreadfulness in all respects.
#umfa2021#umfastrike
Because of Admin the strike drags
From riches they try to make rags
Let there be no doubt
They couldn’t lead out
Of very wet, wet paper bags
#umfa2021#umfastrike
Since UM’s Admin’s lost the plot
They think our resolve must be shot
Just look at the line
We’re much more than fine
Solidarity’s easy to spot
#umfa2021#umfastrike
Just a Wonderful Wizard could save
Our Admin from the way they behave
Like Scarecrow, not smart
Like Tin Man, no heart
Like Cowardly Lion, not brave.
#umfa2021#umfastrike
We promise we’ll help walk you through it
It’s new, so do not just poo-poo it
It’s bargaining, Mike
It helps end a strike
We’ve done it, we’re sure you can do it.
#umfa2021#umfastrike
The Bison, the Forks, Honey Dill
Some great ‘Toban staples, but still
There’s not much that beats
UMFA in the streets
Declaring its collective will!
#umfa2021#umfastrike
Ol’ Michael and Heather, his pal
Both hail from this frigid locale
The two also share
A failure to care
And penchants for sinking morale
#umfa2021#umfastrike
Unencumbered by numbers or facts
Or the history of UM contracts
Admin makes a point
Of tanking the joint
What a bunch of embarrassing hacks
#umfa2021#umfastrike
"On Friday we'll email a warning
We'll give 'em the ol' public scorning"
Get over yourselves
We aren't Santa's elves.
See you on the line Monday morning.
#umfa2021#umfastrike
Admin says: “hey, thanks for the grant
And sorry the money’s been scant
And ‘member when we’d
Applied to, uh, lead?
Yeah, well, um, uh, sorry. We can’t.”
#umfa2021#umfastrike
I guess we should give admin credit
It's high time that somebody said it
They do come in first
At being the worst
And leading ‘till they have misled it.
#umfa2021#umfastrike
Inspired by their well-deserved shame
PC’s want to sell this re-frame
Despite the new buzz
It’s the same as it was
If you do the same things, you’re the same
#umfa2021#umfastrike
There's hope, but this ain't over yet
It will end on the terms that we set
Michael, my dear
We teach history here
We forgive but we do not forget.
#umfa2021#umfastrike
Each doctor, or teacher, or nurse
Who paid into U of M’s purse
Do you think they’d like
To know what ol’ Mike
Is paid now to make the place worse?
#umfa2021#umfastrike
Those who make speeches from thrones
For sure don’t have large student loans
That they must pay off
For years as a prof
Each word of that thing summits groans
#umfa2021#umfastrike
“There’s a mandate!” “Hey! No there ain’t!”
On loop as their boring complaint.
I know they don’t care
But cupboard’s aren’t bare
And Cam Morrill’s likely a saint.
#umfa2021#umfastrike