Ab.

I’m in mourning for my life.

[Ab. @umroused]

every time things are going well in my life, i get this nagging voice inside my head that constantly screams about everything that could possibly go wrong.

[Ab. @umroused]

working from home is wild. i’m making calls to big dogs in the legal field and they have no idea i’m in my bed with no pants on.

[Ab. @umroused]

i think i’m getting engaged in spain for my bday?

[michael @FilledwithUrine]

bro please you know i can’t sleep unless a part of me is touching a part of you

[Ab. @umroused]

every time i see a big honkin snail i think of that one skit from portlandia

[Ab. @umroused]

“cloud is on angry mode”

[Melissa @melissameadowss]

@mrsballs69 Nothing more humbling than looking like a drowned rat in the salon chair

[Ab. @umroused]

i see now why men want to call me mommy. i would wanna call me mommy too.

[Ab. @umroused]

@mossdealer thank you so much. i got rid of it today, but one day i’m growing it out idc. i wanna see if they connect connect. i just feel like it fits my face.

[Ab. @umroused]

i just wanna know what it would look like full grown

[Ab. @umroused]

i feel like i’ve won the lottery.

[Ab. @umroused]

extra thankful for my man today because 6 months ago I throwing up nervous about the work week starting and then I got fired and I was even more stressed, but now i’m living in a new house just relaxing in the sun carefree knowing my bills will be paid. love that. 🌞

[Ab. @umroused]

god my man is so attractive. idc i’ll have 100 babies.

[(((Rachel Finston))) @RachelFinston]

I don’t t think this should be a hot take but if you refuse to treat people with certain drugs because it’s against your religion, or for ideological reasons, you should not have the right to practice medicine.

[felicity shagwell ੯‧̀͡⬮ ᡣ𐭩 @liIpochaco]

im actually gonna go even further and say no woman is immune from this because i’ve been fat my whole life but so many men have lifted me up just to prove theyre strong

[Ab. @umroused]

@tweetjjtweet subtitles and last time i went to a theater the seats were sticky and peeling, the volume was too loud, and there were mice running up and down the stairs. also, at home i can have a bathroom break anytime.

[user @user0000O0]

idc if you have a good relationship with your dad just don’t do it around me

[Rosie Lea @RosieLea_Curio]

TMI, but I just dropped a blood clot the size of my hand. Can you imagine how much conservative men would freak if they actually knew the reality of women's bodies?