Upgraded Sammy

Am on a journey, wanna follow me? follow back assured

[Johnmark Obiefuna @jayhemz]

No Sir.

Part of why some of us save contacts that way is also to remember how we met people.

"Nedu School Lodge" will remain "Nedu School Lodge" because there's another Nedu that is "Nedu Mechanic Lekki."

Regardless of who first Nedu becomes, it's clear.

[Yehgha @yaygha]

About 4 days ago, I watched a YT video that talked about how we came about the term 'colour temperature' and by extension, why warmer-coloured lights (2800 to 3000K) is more relaxing and comfortable, while cooler light (white-ish light) is more stimulating, and suited to work, play and activity, broadly speaking.

Found it particular interesting as I've always prefered incandescent lighting indoors, especially at night because its more conducive to rest, signals sleep time and creates a more intimate ambience for when I have female guests

That video gave scientific backing to my night time preference for warm light (the science always meets me in front, eh?)

Now, maybe because of how excited I was about that discovery, I felt a strong urge to share it with my girl who had just walked into the living room as the video was ending - but caught myself mid-thought, self-reminded she would not share my enthusiasm because I know from experience, such things do not interest her.

So rather than expend my exuberence on an audience that would not share my fascination, I relocated to my desk and rerouted that energy into a deeply rewarding epistemic exercise on the subject.

Moral of the story:

While we all have impulses to share stories, interests or random bits of knowledge with those we love, and expect them to share our interests, it is socially unintelligent to forget that they are separate individuals with minds of their own. They have different interests, different curiosities, different levels of intelligence, different mental landscapes and basically, different things that capture their attention.

To expect that whatever interests us must interest them, or that whatever excites us must excite them, is a textbook case of self-absorption and a consequent inability to map their psychology.

It evinces an inability to fully appreciate separateness and the 'other-ness' of others.

Affection, love, marriage and whatever, does not undo individuality.

So the reason he 'doesn't receive the information in the first place' may very well be that the subject matter does not interest him. But because he is your husband, rather than communicate that lack of interest, he pretends to listen so as not to hurt your feelings.

Which then begs the question: how long will he continue to pretend? And at what point does it become unfair to expect that he shows interest in whatever story you have to share at whatever time - irrespective of his state of mind or individuality?

Okay... I guess that's two questions but you get the point

A better response, then (one which I use and have found to be remarkably effective) would be to (nonverbally) communicate his disinterest in such, as I like to call them, low level gists so that you gradually learn to stop bringing them to him

Or at least, consider whether the subject matter is one that is likely to interest him before sharing. Rather than sharing simply because it interests you.

So the problem is not inattention on his part. The problem is an inability on yours to recognise him as an independent center of exprerience, rather than an extension of yourself.

The issue, in simple terms, is your solipsism

[Upgraded Sammy @upgradedsam]

@adanonso_ Thank God I’m not the only one guilty of this. I almost thought I was a bad person

[KD 🇮🇱🇺🇸 @Amalektgh]

@adanonso_ Me: Tunde is getting divorced
Wife: really? Did they fight? Cheating? Abuse? When? How? Are they seeing a therapist?
Me: I don’t know, I didn’t ask.
Wife: why not? That’s the tea!

[Queeneth Kelechi Nuel @QueenethKelechi]

@adanonso_ Men are sweet
But you see them listening to your gist? Forget it
https://t.co/fHgBKXkvhn

[Cristiano Ronaldo @Cristiano]

RIP THE SCRIPT @Nike

#Ad

[🌷🦋 Love Music 🎶 & Dance 💃🏻🕺🏻 @Tiana_Celine_23]

I couldn't stop laughing.😂😂😂

[JCTHFC @JCTHFC]

Genius! 😂

[👑S.A.L.A.K.O🕊 @UnkleAyo]

I woke up this morning, opened my windows for cross ventilation - instantly, something struck my forehead, and I fell flat.

In absolute shock, I struggled to stand up in order to find out what flew in -

Turned out, it was Gabriel's penalty kick from yesterday night.

[Kiemute @FreshDeltaBwoy]

For those who don't know the penalty when you break any of the FRSC law.

https://t.co/3d4zDYzShA

[Upgraded Sammy @upgradedsam]

@don_pet @TEMII_DAYO The day I try am, wey I play football for heat finish, begin dey sweat, dey tell myself say I need better cold water. As I water touch my body for like 10 seconds, I lose willpower 😂😂

[Upgraded Sammy @upgradedsam]

@FindingKan @MessiElnino

[Efe 🥷🏼| Yeyeboo @Mideefe]

Nigerian mentality core PART 2 😂 I can’t stop laughing

[MrBanks💰 @Mrbankstips]

😂

[Upgraded Sammy @upgradedsam]

@lollypeezle I know even for the ones he had to shake someone else, if it was someone else who picked the paper, they’d have shook him instead 😂😂

[Vikas Singh @vikas_ai_]

Claude FULL COURSE 1 HOUR (Build & Automate Anything)

[Sir Dickson @Wizarab10]

This is life 👏🏽👏🏽

[TobyWrites @tobyasky]

Big ups to Adidas mehn, this video is 100% sick

My favorite place was when he told Messi that he’s the back up just in case…Lamine and Bellingham couldn’t even look at each other too😂

[X҈E҈R҈O҈︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ @IamBxero]

One of your questions was answered right here