You might have seen me “flexing” some small wins on here recently.
It’s not to flex.
It’s for the people who feel that emptiness inside
and don’t know what to do with it.
I didn’t post for almost a year.
I went through some dark times
not depression. emptiness.
The kind nobody talks about
because from the outside
it doesn’t look like anything.
You wake up.
You open the laptop.
You stare at it.
You close it.
You scroll.
You eat.
You scroll again.
The day ends
and you didn’t do anything wrong,
but you didn’t do anything right either.
When the alarm went off
I’d snooze it for an hour.
Not because I was tired.
Because there was no reason to get up.
I was about to quit everything
and start over.
Again.
But every night, I prayed.
Every single night.
I talked to Jesus
because I knew He was right there.
Sometimes I had nothing to say
and I just sat with Him.
I didn’t always feel an answer.
But I kept going back.
And I stopped waiting to feel ready.
I started showing up
before the feeling came.
Opening the laptop
even when it felt pointless.
Doing the work
even when I didn’t believe in it that day.
The motivation never showed up first.
It showed up after.
Every time.
Then something shifted.
Nothing crazy from the outside
the kind of opportunity
that’s always around
if you’re paying attention.
But I saw it differently.
I moved on it differently.
I think that’s how He works
most of the time.
Not lightning bolts.
Just you,
finally ready to see
what was already there.
I have a direction now.
I know why I opened the laptop
this morning.
I sleep less
and feel more rested.
I wake up 20-30 minutes before the alarm, because I want to be up.
I stopped needing
to escape my own life.
The best part of finally getting results
isn’t the wins.
It’s having a purpose.
And knowing
I was never doing it alone.
If you’re in that empty place right now
talk to Him. ✝️
The real version,
not the polished one.
And get up and move,
even when it feels pointless.
God guides.
But you still have to walk.
The climb is the gift.
See you at the top.
Japanese actor Hiroyuki Sanada spoke about the contradictions of human nature:
“Some people dream of having a swimming pool at home, while those who have one hardly ever use it. Those who have lost a loved one feel a profound sense of loss, while others often complain about their living relatives. Those without a partner long for one, while those who have one often don't appreciate it. The hungry would give anything for a meal, while the satiated complain about the taste of their food. Those without a car dream of owning one, while those who have a car are always looking for a better one.”
The key to happiness is gratitude: truly seeing and appreciating what we already have, and understanding that somewhere, someone would give anything for what we take for granted.
This babe said she wants the type of guy that would ask her if she is free in 2 weeks because he wants to fly her to Dubai and fly her first class. She said any man that flies her economy is a useless person.
Such a person cannot love you and has zero desire to love. This performative love that is Instagrammable is delusional.
.
.
.
There is a lady that loves Malta Guinness. My guy bought her two crates and she melted in his arms. I know another one that loves avocado and anytime her man buys avocado for her, she lights up like a child. True desire!
I always wonder if you people don't enjoy life's little pleasure. Don't you have something that you genuinely enjoy when nobody is watching? You see that mama that sells ewa agoyin and soft bread that you enjoy, tell your date you love her food. You love climbing trees and plucking ebelebo, tell your person. You enjoy the silliness of solidifying milo and chewing on it like a snack, tell your person. If you're afraid to tell your person what you really enjoy, it is not love. 1Jn 4:18 says "there is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love."
Try to enjoy things that do not require external validation. A girl saw a public proposal and she spoke out that if she doesn't get something like this, she is not accepting it because she does not deserve less. Her friend asked her, would you be okay getting it if you won't have to post it on social media and she said No. So it is not that she actually likes it, she just wants to pepper people and get validation. Some of the thing you people crave, you do not really care about it. You just feel like it elevates you in people's eyes.
Don't murder the child in you trying to live up to external validation. Do the things that make the child in you, light up.