usagi ☾

they/them ☆ 27 ☆ edtwt ☆ bmi 21.1 ☆ pro recovery for everyone but myself

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ pinned ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

I want so so badly to pull off the effortlessly pretty weird girl look who gives off friendly vibes but I'm not pretty at all I'm just weird :( I don't think I'll appear friendly until I'm skinny :(

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

@st4rv3b1txh seems so weird to me to see "a lot of autistic ppl had bad experiences with their parents" and go "but what about MY feelings :(" instead of thinking hmm maybe we need to educate more parents on how to properly raise autistic children

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

@thintechgodhead I don't want hrt because I don't want to be a man but if I could go back in time and get puberty blockers I would do it 100%

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

@thintechgodhead I'm not dysphoric about much but god I HATE how wide my hips are :( why can't I just like give a lil to some of my transfem friends. so unfair!!!

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

@jusdcanneberge my favorite thing is when I tell older ppl I'm vegan and they ask if I can eat bread 😭

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

just saw an account that had me blocked that I was GLAD to be blocked by like I never thought I'd see a raw milk right winger who has my edtwt account blocked but thank god 🙏🙏

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

I hate having an ed bc idk how to explain why I care so much about being skinny without sounding at least a little bit shallow or triggering someone else :(

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

complained to friends about my wl being slow and they're like "you're a healthy weight tho :( pls don't be super skinny for beauty standards" and idk what to say to that without sounding disordered or really ignorant 💔

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

if I ever get to my ugw idk what to say if they notice I'm underweight when I've struggled so much just losing weight in the high healthy bmi range..... I'm cursed with amazing smart woke friends who care about my health </3

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

GOD THIS IS SO MEEEE sorry I wasn't socialized enough as a child and have severe social anxiety but maybe ppl will finally like me once I'm skinny and cute and approachable

[𝔰𝔫𝔲𝔣𝔣𝔟𝔞𝔦𝔱 @3nuffpup]

u have never met a real lookmaxer until you meet a autistic girl who learned that people will overlook her being weird and off putting if she’s pretty

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

@pam__pam____ @thintechgodhead so many ppl think of eds as a moral failing rather than an illness it's crazy

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

@ray0808080808 it's still totally valid to be upset about it tho!! it really sucks that eds are viewed as "extreme weight loss" rather than an illness by most ppl :/

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

@ray0808080808 I understand what you mean! I don't blame the individual for not knowing what eds are actually like though bc it's just not common knowledge :( but if someone knows all that and WANTS to be sick then they are sick already 100%

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

@ray0808080808 I think it's more sad that our society pushes people to be desperate to lose weight and then turns around and treats eds like they're a weight loss method and not an illness, so ppl go into ed spaces wanting to lose weight and end up with an illness eventually

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

@ray0808080808 you're right that there are ppl who are in disordered eating but not ed but I don't think calling it "disrespectful" is the right word and I don't like how this post is phrased tbh. it could very easily become an ed for a lot of those ppl :(

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

maybe I just need to eat low carb idk?? or maybe I don't have an insulin resistance and I'm just a fatass 😭😭

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

remembered I may have undiagnosed pcos

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

I haven't lost any weight for the past month despite counting calories and believing I'm under my deficit. surely I'm not in a plateau already??? am I fucking up calorie counting THAT badly????

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

correction it's been ALMOST 2 MONTHS???? I wanna cry :( how do I stress so much over how much I eat and STILL NOT LOSE????????????

[usagi ☾ @usagispo]

I haven't lost any weight for the past month despite counting calories and believing I'm under my deficit. surely I'm not in a plateau already??? am I fucking up calorie counting THAT badly????