Ive gained my starting weight back, but recovery made me develop bed. so im going back on edtwt and going to eat under 500 cals again. i hate myself like never before. every single night i wake up at least 2-3 times with an urge to eat sugar. so i binge. well i c/s most of it
hey so recovery is going mentally very nice like genuinely i just eat normally like i used to (almost) but for some reason i canβt gain im hardstuck bmi 15 and this is genuinely making me mad because i cant stay like that i need a healthy weight and body ts is scaring
me
iβm scared that im experiencing refeeding syndrome because of my "self recovery" and i most certainly have kidney failure (or beginning at least) if i can deal with that and go to uni i will be the happiest everβ¦ the fact refeeding syndrome can be fatal is what freaks me out
told my mom and probably gonna end up hospitalized and now itβs certain, iβm gonna be followed through recovery by professionals. iβm reassured but devastated that it had to go that far. I was supposed to go to uni next week but hey guess what i guess the fuck not? iβm gonn cry
i know im very prone to anxiety and "fear of having health issues" but i saw how my urine looked and clearly suspicious for renal failure. am i gonna make it until next week??π
im full of anxiety, not because im scared of gaining but because im scared to not gain fast enough and for health issues to appear. i genuinely sleep so bad because of that. i went to the doctor today for blood/urine test and i might have renal problems
im genuinely so scared i just want to go back to a healthy weight this is all i wish for. as soon as possible, but i canβt just eat 1 million cals and gain in all in a day. its a long process and thats why im anxious. Next week is results of the tests, i hope my kidneys are safe
so motivated to recover, i was so much funnier before and enjoyed food and was so much more pretty and myself and way more loved, gonna stop counting calories bye
recovery twt. i need help. Im so determined to recover now (go back to my original weight idc) but im ONLY scared that my fat distribution will be different. I love how my body used to look but iβve read stuff online that scares me saying it will be different etc. Is this legit?
im only talking abt my perception of myself btw but genuinely i just donβt look good. healthy or not. so might as well be healthy (i say as i struggle to recover)
i work in a store that sells clothes and when i walk past the mirrors my own reflection disgusts me. i became bmi 14.7 to look good and i end up looking ugly. my face is scary, same for my torso. my legs are thin, i like them in skirts, but they donβt match my body. have to recov