Mollie

Epidemiologist, anthropologist, health economist, data ballerina. Cultivator of the absurd.

[Mollie @verdandi]

"Nobody here has any explosives or ecoterrorist aspirations. We love America, long live the police, you know, just be cool, man."

[Mollie @verdandi]

“Your lesbianism is lesbianing.”

“Slappreciated.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

"Are you a lesbian?"
“I still invite dick as a form of self harm.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

“I’m not here to tell you what to do; I’m telling you what you’re doing is a bad idea.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

“Optimism and denial look exactly the same from the outside.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

“If you’re going to write a terrible song, make it a banger and punch up.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

“If Nancy Pelosi became a Republican, both parties would get smarter.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

“I learned something new! My oyster is the whole world. Wait, no. My world is an oyster.”
“The world is YOUR oyster?”
“Yes.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

“Engineering is like riding a bike. Except that the bike is on fire. And I'm on fire. And everything is on fire because I'm in hell.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

Violence should not be tolerated in American politics. Neither should hate speech.

[Mollie @verdandi]

“You look familiar…”
“Do you watch porn?”

[Mollie @verdandi]

Jack in the box: both a hamburger chain and a really weird command. Also, strangely, a children’s toy. Either way, you get a surprise at the end.

[Mollie @verdandi]

“You can’t get friend-zoned if no one wants to be your friend.”
“Modern solutions to modern problems!”

[Mollie @verdandi]

On relationship misunderstandings:
“That kind of thing happens when you have different cultures*”
“…Like when you date someone from the land of absolute fucking bananas.”

*for context, this was not the case

[Mollie @verdandi]

“I’m sure you have excellent reasons, but unless you can communicate them, you can go fuck yourself.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

“I just want to smash white rice until I can’t feel my toes. I will fuck up white rice until the day I die.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

“Being annoying is more annoying when you’re doing it in French.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

“Hey T, do you speak WoW?”
“No, I’m Vietnamese.”

[Mollie @verdandi]

"As you can see, she has a type."
"People who look like they're not good at magic, but do it anyway?"

[Mollie @verdandi]

“Foxes. You know, like cat-dogs.”