not very eva

it's me eva from twitter they suspended my old account bc it was too funny and clever. yelling on @youcantdohockey she/they

[not very eva @veryalt]

i was gonna complain about something else but never mind i just saw a dog in a sidecar!!!!

[not very eva @veryalt]

some regrets about my choice to get mad about an 18 minute train wait after working summer reading kickoff all day and walking two miles in the humidity to make a point to no one about it

[not very eva @veryalt]

@bigjuicygollum mallet to the head syndrome

[not very eva @veryalt]

i was drawing with a kid at work today and she was very quietly studying the dumb little gnome house i was doodling and then drew her own version of it 😭

[not very eva @veryalt]

really hard to beat the 2024 winners but this is an admirable challenger into the genre

[Jen Rice @jen_rice_]

I am obsessed with this finalist in this year's Michigan “I voted” sticker design contest

[not very eva @veryalt]

yelled at some teen boys horsing around on the busy train to pull it together to complete my old man hat trick

[not very eva @veryalt]

socks don’t stay up like they used to, no one know how to use public doorways, and too many things feel entitled to beep loudly these days. and that’s just to start

[not very eva @veryalt]

i want dinner from a restaurant that doesn’t exist anymore!!!

[not very eva @veryalt]

One Fear

[NBC News @NBCNews]

A flesh-eating parasite that had been kept out of U.S. livestock for decades has been detected in Texas, threatening the nation’s cattle industry and food supply at a time when prices are already high. https://t.co/p011Q4crOe

[alex lei @alexL_E_I]

checking in with the goat

[Henry Winkler @hwinkler4real]

Hunger

[not very eva @veryalt]

do not talk to me about the screwworms, i am Afraid

[not very eva @veryalt]

“like a klingon prison” is rattling around in my mind like a loose penny

[not very eva @veryalt]

this would not be possible without the collaboration of the greatest city in the world (chicago illinois)

[not very eva @veryalt]

i went to three different locations over the course of two weekend evenings im the most powerful 38 year old alive

[Will Mahoney @HeelWillMahoney]

BREAKING: David from Real World New Orleans has pulled out of the Great American State Fair.

[not very eva @veryalt]

@scummmbunnny i keep seeing people here be like “one month sublet opportunity!!!” bitch you’re thinking of a house sitter and you should pay THEM

[not very eva @veryalt]

@iffypopireland i’m included!!!

[not very eva @veryalt]

incredible volume of balding and/or gray haired people at the rilo kiley show

[RMNB @rmnb]

NHL releases schedule for 2026 Stanley Cup Final between Carolina Hurricanes and Vegas Golden Knights https://t.co/5BcGE5tFqr

[not very eva @veryalt]

tell me about it brother