balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger

Anonymous Bodybuilding Friend to All 😄

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

natty with low PR and shitty physique found alive and well inside planet fitness

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

we’re gonna crack you open and boil you later little buddy!

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

fixed my coworkers cars today, they got t-boned and totaled said car a mere 4 hours later like i have the touch of doom

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

been too busy stackking my bread up to really gave a fuck like that

my manager: dude, please just chop the fucking vegetables

[Solzhenixon @sardonic_greek]

[measuring her with calipers] you have. A Wifeoid skull. And distinct My Wife physiognomy

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

How do you cast a spell of death and despair? Is my magicka just sub par?

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

pharaoh says Plague of locusts happening soon

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

[realizing my checking sits at 1.07 and my savings at 0.60, turning to cruise ship bartender]

Heh, buddy, I think this is all on the house tonight… 😉

[pulls up h & m v-neck to reveal armed suicide vest]

[John Kennedy @FrazzleMyGimp]

“wait a second… Heat rises” (it hits me) “heat rises!”

Bank teller on floor: what?

“Heat rises!”

(I rush at the armed robber and he shoots me in the face killing me instantly. It’s unclear what my plan was)

[Grandson @kev_the_hope]

City girls music so mean. Like I don’t deserve no pussy cause I’m financially unstable? Like no pussy at all?

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

individually asking my group of mid 20s to early 30s male friends if they are carrying the mark of the beast (circumcised) very loudly in public spaces

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

Blow them all to smithereens

[Mimany🅱️aker @MimanyMaker]

What if i cutted both my arms off and went to the sperm bank

[𝒄𝒉𝒖𝒏𝒌 𝒐𝒇 𝒑𝒊𝒔𝒔 @chunkofpiss]

my wife knows I would kill her in cold blood if she ever logged into my runescape group ironman account

[c @c110101101]

Grown man casting spells. Pick up the broadsword lil bro

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

Is anybody home?

[balthazar, friendly man hugging tiger @vicioustiger]

Your puthy hanging out girl