Jesse Jarvis

Canadian dad and aging jock hipster

If you enjoy being a dad
Or just want to be better
Join one of my masterclasses or dm me a q

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

It is absolutely appalling that #vancouver Cannot gets its act together enough to have the science world skytrain free of danger.

Hundreds of kids and families pass through there every day in the summer and have to fear for their safety. Unacceptable.

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

Don’t forget our one oil company!

[Made In Canada @MadelnCanada]

Canada has a unique democracy unlike anywhere else in the world it is governed by two rival cellphone companies and a powerful grocery store.

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

Cc: Soccer Canada.

How many national players were actually DEVELOPED in Canada??

[Aakash Gupta @aakashgupta]

In Germany, a talented 14-year-old earns his club money. In America, his parents pay the club $15,000 a year.

That single inversion explains why "we will not" is the most accurate line ever written about US soccer.

FIFA built a global system for this. Training compensation and solidarity payments send a cut of every transfer fee back to the clubs that developed the player, from age 12 onward. Develop one future pro and your academy gets paid for a decade. Barcelona's La Masia, Ajax, every Bundesliga academy runs on this logic. The kid is the asset.

US Soccer refuses to enforce those rules. When Seattle's Crossfire Premier claimed its $60,000 share of DeAndre Yedlin's transfer to Tottenham, it got nothing. Claims on the Dempsey and Bradley transfers died partly because the federation couldn't even produce the youth training records.

So American clubs earn zero dollars when a kid turns pro. They earn when a kid enrolls. Which makes the parent the customer, and the product is whatever keeps the parent writing checks: travel tournaments, hotel weekends, $500 showcase events, private training at $100 an hour. Elite pathways run $8,000 to $20,000 a year. A comparable academy spot in Italy costs about 120 euros.

Follow the incentive one level deeper and it gets darker. A club dependent on fees can't cut its weakest paying players, so rosters optimize for retention over development. The scouting pool shrinks to families who can afford the cliff, which appears around age 11, exactly when development matters most. The country runs a talent filter sorted by household income instead of ability.

Every four years someone proposes fixing this. The proposal always requires the people profiting from the $15,000 model to vote themselves out of business.

They will not.

[Aakash Gupta @aakashgupta]

In Germany, a talented 14-year-old earns his club money. In America, his parents pay the club $15,000 a year.

That single inversion explains why "we will not" is the most accurate line ever written about US soccer.

FIFA built a global system for this. Training compensation and solidarity payments send a cut of every transfer fee back to the clubs that developed the player, from age 12 onward. Develop one future pro and your academy gets paid for a decade. Barcelona's La Masia, Ajax, every Bundesliga academy runs on this logic. The kid is the asset.

US Soccer refuses to enforce those rules. When Seattle's Crossfire Premier claimed its $60,000 share of DeAndre Yedlin's transfer to Tottenham, it got nothing. Claims on the Dempsey and Bradley transfers died partly because the federation couldn't even produce the youth training records.

So American clubs earn zero dollars when a kid turns pro. They earn when a kid enrolls. Which makes the parent the customer, and the product is whatever keeps the parent writing checks: travel tournaments, hotel weekends, $500 showcase events, private training at $100 an hour. Elite pathways run $8,000 to $20,000 a year. A comparable academy spot in Italy costs about 120 euros.

Follow the incentive one level deeper and it gets darker. A club dependent on fees can't cut its weakest paying players, so rosters optimize for retention over development. The scouting pool shrinks to families who can afford the cliff, which appears around age 11, exactly when development matters most. The country runs a talent filter sorted by household income instead of ability.

Every four years someone proposes fixing this. The proposal always requires the people profiting from the $15,000 model to vote themselves out of business.

They will not.

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

Stop slandering #19. If he could have he would have. Hasn't been healthy in 18 months and mishandling his injury could be another 18 months of recovery.

[Mike Martignago @MikeMartignago]

I have issues with people thinking Alphonso Davies refused to play or faked injury in a home World Cup considering this guy has previously played for Canada on cow pastures in Curacao, Haiti and the Cayman Islands.

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

@RichBucciarelli It will not, unfortunately. The best Canadian players were not developed in the Canadian system. No one talks about this.

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

All Canadian Soccer development should now be focused on 1-touch shooting from inside the 18. Teach nothing else until we finally find our shooter.

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

@JeffVeillette Agreed. Clown show take of Stephen A. Smith proportions

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

Dictionary jokes.

[Merriam-Webster @MerriamWebster]

Why is it ‘cancelled’ in the U.K. but ‘canceled’ in the U.S.?

Because we gave them that L in 1776.

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

Happy 4th of July to my American friends. Keep them hands safe with all them fireworks

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

@CanMNTonly Agree to disagree.

He admitted himself he didn’t adjust to adding a 5th back in the 2nd half of the Swiss game and the 1st Swiss goal was a direct result of pressing too hard.

Nice try.

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

@sportsnetmurph 10 World Cup days is the equivalent of one normal day. Why be worried?

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

@CanMNTonly Well some teams, especially underdog teams who might be tied near the end of a game, might play for PKs. Marsch has already been too aggressive, seems like he might recalibrate in such a huge game

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

@burtoncummings Canadian treasure.

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

I drive this highway often. It’s beautiful.

[Give A Shit About Nature @giveashitnature]

Canada built bridges for bears, and the bears used them.

So did wolves, cougars, elk, moose, lynx, wolverines, bighorn sheep, black bears, deer, and almost everything else trying to cross one of the busiest highways in the Rockies.

The Trans-Canada Highway cuts through Banff National Park for 82 km. For decades, it did what highways do: split habitat in half, severed migration routes, isolated populations, and turned animal movement into roadkill.

So Parks Canada tried something that sounded ridiculous to a lot of people at the time: they built wildlife bridges and tunnels.

They look nice, but they're far from a decoration. Forested overpasses wide enough for grizzlies and elk. Dark underpasses for cougars and black bears. Fencing along the highway to keep animals off the pavement and guide them toward safe crossings.

At the time, critics called it a waste of money and editorials opined that animals would never use them.

Fortunately, animals don't read opinion pieces. Since monitoring began, wildlife have used Banff’s crossings more than 250,000 documented times.

Grizzlies took years to trust them. Elk started testing them while they were still under construction. Different species chose different designs: grizzlies and elk tended to prefer wide, open overpasses, while cougars and black bears often used narrower underpasses.

The results were not subtle. Wildlife-vehicle collisions dropped by more than 80% overall. For elk and deer, they dropped by more than 96%.

Banff now has one of the most studied wildlife crossing systems on Earth, and countries around the world have looked to it as a model.

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

@benfowlkesMMA Happy to hear that. Love Montana. Shoutout Whitefish and Kalispell

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

@one_miloo Based on how he’s building that wall he’s paid by the hour

[Jesse Jarvis @vivsavage]

@SportsnetSpec If your coach is Mike Babcock than yes. When it’s a Malhotra it should be fine.