Waldron Quotes

Anything and everything that is funny and said by a Waldron (and Sam).

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Charlotte: “People are not very flammable” #badwaystodie

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2 from Jake to Paige’s friend Liz who has questionable taste in boyfriends:

She needs two rules for a guy - “no kids, no priors”

Liz: “I only did that once”
Jake: “You shoulda done it nonce!”

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Jenna looking at body spray to buy for Mom “this is a spot-on Mom smell” #bodyspray #fruity

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“It’s not poop!” #ItWasWine -Elle

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“What are those animals that build dams?” -Charlotte
“Beavers.” - Paige
“Why do they do that? Like do they just do that for fun?” -Charlotte #Dam #BeaverQuestions

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PPH - “…and the other side has a sitting area for the ladies… where they can cluck away” #gmomnearlychoked

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“I’m gonna crack her little skull like a stubborn walnut” - Elle #TooSpecific

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Lisa: “I had a bad dream last night… all of our sports teams lost… and we forgot to take out the recycling” #dreamscometrue

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“I think that thing is it’s eyeballs” points at jellyfish - Charlotte

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“What’s mine is yours, and what’s yours is yours…I’m just sometimes allowed to use it.” -Billy to Elle #marriagebliss

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Gmom: “I love to shuck” #cornonthecob

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“You were blessed with personality.” - Dad to Jenny

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“If he clenches any harder, he’ll be inside out.” - Billy #dad #powersout

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“Are Richmond’s milkshakes ‘the bomb’ or just ‘bomb’?” - Gmom #Brigantine

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“It’s like a bumpy sock, you can’t feel it after awhile.” - Charlotte about bathing suit bottom wedgies

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“Hearing Aids are great mom!” - Jenny
“What did she say?!” - Gmom

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“I didn’t know you loved him!” -Elle to Jamie #Jesus

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“Give me chocolate. Am I right?” - Dad #BabyMetal #GinmeChocolate

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“White-Bread Pennsylvania” #Hershey #RapConcert

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Bill to Kelly Mc after she explained that it hurts to sit cross-legged: “criss cross apple f****!” #gettingold