@Rose_Oats I know. And it sucks and it hurts like hell and sometimes you get the feeling that your chest might explode if you don't feel her hug in 5 seconds!
But it doesn't explode. You're still here. And I'm here with you.
(If that helps a little bit)
@Rose_Oats There's a million words that I'd like to say.
You're not at fault. And you couldn't fix this. But you can fix yourself. It might even give you a chance for another shot if you succeed. If that's what you want, this is your path.
@Rose_Oats You're doing fine. People just expect you to take their advice, instantly apply it and end up smiling and super joyful.
But that's not bow it works. You feel miserable. What you had was rough but amazing. It's okay to feel miserable after such a big loss.
But there's progress.