warlock trainer

alchemy enthusiast, proud imp summoner 💜😈

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

I requested some time off to my boss this morning. In response he let out a groan and rolled on his back, exposing his vulnerable underbelly so I could hit him with guaranteed critical strikes for a short while.

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

@GaterHouser Great idea 😤

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

if ur powerviolence record art isnt a black and white image of a grizzly crime scene, I aint listenin

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

@GaterHouser Hell yes

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

The Council is sending my ass to super-maximum security prism

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

I’ve never discharged a firearm. The first time I do will be to take another’s life.

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

the all new Yevgeny Prigozhin meal exclusively at McDonald’s

[ray of torchlight @GaterHouser]

uncle weed will have you listening to the acoustic zeppelin songs thinking you should re read lord of the rings

cousin weed has you googling "mayan cell phones real" with all the curtains closed and your heart sounding like a jackhammer

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

posting gore in the department teams chat

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

my cousins’ supervisor at work sent a company-wide email asking everyone to remove their k cups when they’re done with the coffee maker and the employees banded together in the reply-alls and were dunking on him so hard that he had to go home

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

toadette should start a podcast

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

Took a new route to work this morning and found the final missing sorcery scroll for the completionist achievement

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

Howling Grotto Public Storage

Space Available!
Low Mortality Rates!

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

@DirkWhatever purple man found dead from multiple gunshot wounds in apparent execution-style slaying

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

I’m giving Grimace a 20-pack of 5mg edibles and a carton of American Spirit menthol lights for his birthday.

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

Remember how they made Meowth a NJ guido?

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

a kappy’s liquors franchise owned and operated by the hat from mario odyssey

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

the young IT lads love it when i play elden ring on my lunch break

[warlock trainer @warlocktrainer]

kobold driving a bagged ‘97 integra