Wayne

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

Complaining is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do yet gets you nowhere

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

The rearview mirror is the smallest glass in your car for a reason because the past doesn't matter as much as the future(windshield)🚘

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

You get fixed in the hospital, you heal at home

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

The reason I don't paint is because it is pain with a t

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

If wishes were fishes, we'd all be in the sea #wayniewisdom

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

What do you like to dip your curlies in?

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

I flew a kite this morning,it shredded just like trumps legacy😉

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

PAGA takes down MAGA

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

Something to ponder...Could the Blue Moon tonight portend a Blue sweep in the election ?

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

You can fuck with my wife, but don't fuck with my money

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

A Hebrew with a tool is a dangerous thing.

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

I think farting is the coolest thing someone can do. They all sound different, smell different and it's just cool

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

You can look at your fridge, you can look at your freezer, you can look at your pantry, but look at your dick

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

It doesn't matter, I can do dishes when I'm drunk.

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

If it's not your dick's fault, it's your asphalt.

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

A drone is cheaper than a helicopter!

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

All my tabs disappeared in chrome. Is that Tabula Rosa? #technotard

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

There's no such thing as gravity; the earth sucks.

[Wayne @wayniewisdom]

The psychological aspect of Costco is that there is no signage...And then they feed you!