Emily Weekes

To wish you were someone else is to waste the person you are.

Instagram: @weekesemily

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

On the scale of ‘drinks bath water’ to ‘licks the ground’ how weird is your toddler?

[Justin Trudeau @JustinTrudeau]

Update: This month alone, we’re getting 6.8 million doses of Pfizer’s vaccine for Canadians aged 12 and up. So let’s be clear - we have enough doses for you. Now’s the time to get your shots.

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

Just tried to explain to my brother in law what it feels like for your water to break - his response, “oh so it’s like wearing soggy socks”
….
Yes, just like that 😂

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

The winners commercials are 👌🏼 though #ThursdayNightFootball

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

Watching #ThursdayNightFootball with my hubs + his friend and have learned:
Both are losing their fantasy
Someone is named ‘Decoy Metcalfe’
“Flag on the play - hands to the face” is a common issue.

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

Anyone else’s spouse talk so loudly in their sleep that even the @Google home is like “WTF is he trying to say”?!
Just me? Cool cool cool. @joeblan25

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

Made the mistake of bragging that my newborn doesn’t puke or spit up… 3hrs later I’m covered in projectile vomit. #newmom #fail

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

My baby is less than 2 weeks old and I have already discovered that @Tesla doesn’t have a child ride on available. Hoping this becomes a priority for @elonmusk #mommyandme #ModelY

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

Whoever said ‘Don’t cry over spilt milk’ clearly never breastfed. #newmom #breastfeeding

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

Anyone else look at their lawn and think “shitttt what’s our water bill at?” #adulting

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

Indecision may or may not be my problem.

[Joe @joeblan25]

My pregnant wife @weekesemily is currently sitting in our car with a sweater and seat warmer on because she sets the temperature to 17 and it’s 30 outside. 🤦‍♂️

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

Husband: “sorry I’m listening to JT”
Me: “Justin Timberlake?”
Husband: ...
Me: “Ohhh, not that JT”
#cdnpoli #JustinTrudeau @joeblan25

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

My husband’s description of pregnancy (to me, his pregnant wife) “yeah, it starts like an egg and then gets more like an egg” #wtf

[Farrah Khan @farrahsafiakhan]

How many women are getting flashbacks of being in meetings with men who interrupt them?

[Joe @joeblan25]

My wife has been training her father for 45 minutes to join a zoom meeting which will be with a bunch of retired boaters. I bet their meeting will be an hour of tutorials on how to use zoom #Boomer #retirement 🥱🤦🏼 @weekesemily

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

@joeblan25 Excuse me while I go Carol Baskin on your ass.

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

The guy beside me just pulled out a wipe to disinfect everything and is now reading Darwin’s Origin of Species #covid19 #onlythestrong

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

“No one said the future would be pretty” - my dads response to the #cybertruck 😂

[Joe @joeblan25]

Turns out I’m not as active as my Apple Watch made me believe. My weight was set to 180kg instead of 180 lbs. My dominance of @weekesemily is over. #fitnessfail #AppleWatch

[Emily Weekes @weekesemily]

@CityofMooseJaw will always be my hometown... but I’d love for it to figure out the whole “4 way stop” thing. #struggleisreal #whosup #wtf