tweety

views are yours, please tell me what to think

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

if you're ever curious what somebody has to do to cope with life just look at what they're currently doing

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@MeganBitchell i recognize all 9 of these avis but of those 9 i only know the identity of 5 and of those 5 im only acquainted with 2 and of those 2 i'd only fight for 1 and that 1 also happens to be the most misaligned mf on this chart. what the hell.

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

uh oh! unsure whether their reply to your bit is genuinely angry or just playing along?

options:

verify bit and/or sincerely apologize
+mature
+good guy shit
-sincerity looks/feels super uncool
-ruins bit

dont give a fuck
+looks/feels super cool
+is super cool
-sociopath?

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@cockremover @InsertZeitgeist oh i know, seemed funnier to pretend i didnt, due to context.

tbf, reason i can read you is cos i make none of the assumptions that most ppl make regarding the minds and intents of others. those assumptions are handy time savers but lead to loads of unfortunate misunderstandings

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@cockremover @InsertZeitgeist lmao! unless you're not joking in which case, yep i sure do!

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@jewbyboobie @PunishedBonus "pulse poundino action movie?"

"no. also that's not a word. also O is already on the board. also shut up."

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

trouble getting laid? just dm 48 people and ask if they wanna

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@cockremover if you were my mom i'd run, too

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

if the good lord didnt want us punching babies he would have taught them proper footwork

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@ItIsMeAHorse im just talking about shaft

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

evidence of a conspiracy, obviously. to do what, tho? avoid gestation?

[@Chicago1Ray 🇺🇸 @Chicago1Ray]

Why are there no pictures of Michelle pregnant with Malia, like there are with Melania

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@cockremover nobody's buying! i've tried investment bankers, faux trendy libertarians, dog food companies...

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

wont someone please think of the children??

[spiro 🇺🇸 @spiroBAYC]

Scrolling through twitter tonight is absolutely gut wrenching & it’s not bc of the bored ape floor price.

It’s bc so many OG apes I’ve grown w/ since mint are getting their apes liquidated via loan protocols.

I want to help, we should all be extending hands to help right now.

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@cockremover these apes ARE my family. so yes, of course i have

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@cockremover emma my entire home is filled with bored apes they dont even know how to make jpegs they only know how to make poop. pls send help. preferably in the form of coin bits

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

im being informed these are adults? who spent their money on ape jpegs? that doesnt track.

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@halomancer1 now if you were able to learn that with just a few beers imagine what you could learn with 20 more?

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@NoCatsNoLife_m @lawfulspice its like looking in a mirror

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

@cockremover "waiter, what is this penis doing in my soup??"

"the backstroke"

[tweety @weirdwithwords]

i was thinking of how schizophrenics are afraid to see the doctor, and i thought what if we trained dogs to give them medical advice. like telling them when they're going to die