The Southern Dandy

lampshades designer. Get your own at

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

Throw some cards and poker chips on the table so my mom doesn't think we're just sitting here drinking.

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

Trying to accomplish all of my goals this year.

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

Her: He's so quiet. Is he an empty vase of blissful ignorance or do the Olympian reaches of his wisdom and brilliance know no bounds?

Me:

[Sophia Benoit @1followernodad]

I watch my porn on mute because silent men is the true fantasy.

[Mayhem 😈 @NawImForrealHoe]

For a limited time only u can make ur cotton picking experience a great one.Comfy gloves & hats!😒😂#GetYourTrumpGear

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

@jpaulmasengale
I see you joinin this boyband and calling it "Drowning in Despair"or"We Hate our Dads MORE than You"

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

God damn it Robert. You ate an entire pizza for breakfast and now you're eating an entire cake "Elevensies?"

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

@datlarbieguy you're welcome

[Sophia Benoit @1followernodad]

send everyone you know photos of Criss Angel with no explanation

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

Me: OMFG.... Shut up! ! !

My butt: Make me

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

I wish I were as badass as the guy from Breaking the magician's code.

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

@jpaulmasengale

His lips said unemployed, but his eyes..??

They said unemployable psychopath..

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

@bethany_white8 their slowmo walks and snazzy suits have me in a daze.

[Pete Holmes @peteholmes]

i'll die before i stop saying lisa needs braces every time someone says dental plan

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

#ねこあつめ

[☯️ LipPlush ☯️ @LipLush1]

I wish my vibrator was as loud as my neighbors lawnmower on Sunday mornings.

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

It's the game of WHICH ONE ISN'T ROOFIED: Nobody wins.

By Milton Bradley

[The Southern Dandy @wendyisabutt]

@bethany_white8 why is he wearing lip stick?