Will Harrell

[kie @criminalplaza]

if i send you this it means i want to go home

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

I went to In-N-Out and ordered a cheeseburger. The cashier, a calm young woman named Destiny, asked me a question I did not expect.

"You want that Animal Style?"

I paused.

I did not know what this meant. But a samurai does not admit he does not know. So I answered with weight.

"...Animal Style."

"Cool. So that's mustard-grilled, extra spread, grilled onions, pickles. Yeah?"

I understood now. This was a sacred permission. For one meal, I was being told to put down my manners at the door. To eat the way a beast eats, without shame. I had waited my whole life for someone to give me this order.

"Yes," I said. "I will become the animal."

Destiny did not blink. "...Okay. You want your fries Animal Style too?"

I stopped. Even the potatoes?

"The potatoes also become animals?"

"I mean, they get cheese and sauce and grilled onions, so..."

"Then yes. Let the potatoes abandon their restraint as well."

"...Got it." She was the calmest woman I have ever met. "3x3, 4x4, or just the one?"

I did not know these numbers, but I knew a challenge when I heard one. "How many must I face?"

"It's, like, how many patties you want."

"How many is the most honorable?"

"...Four is a lot."

"Then four. A warrior does not ask for fewer."

She wrote it down without argument. A 4x4, Animal Style, with animal fries. She warned me once, kindly. "That's gonna be huge." I told her I was counting on it.

It arrived. It was a tower. Cheese and sauce ran down my hands the moment I lifted it. There was no clean way to eat it. There was no dignified way. That was the entire point.

I ate it like a beast. Both hands, no honor, grilled onion on my chin, and I have to be honest with you, it was the best thing I have ever put in my mouth.

For thirty years I have kept my manners at every table in the world.

They handed me a burger and told me to be an animal, and I have never felt so free.

So tell me, America.

The whole country knows the secret menu. What else are you hiding in plain sight?

And "Animal Style." Was I eating the animal, or finally becoming one?

[Brian Allen @allenanalysis]

Australian World Cup fans were caught chanting:

“Aussie boys are on a bender, Donald Trump is a sex offender.”

The tournament is barely underway and the chants are already in midseason form. 💀

[p. @sixinchbeys]

how do you face your family after going on love island and getting spanked on national television

[Everybody Hates Rich @Corporate_Rich]

These people never take a stand over genocide, imperialism, war, etc. only homosexuality. Typical christians are some of the worst people ever.

[🖤ℨ𝔬𝔢 𝔖𝔦𝔫𝔫𝔰🖤 @ZoeSinns]

"the end of the Left" and it's just a bunch of cucks celebrating a pedophile's 80th birthday

[Acyn @Acyn]

De Niro: I hate to say it, but loving our country is starting to sound like an abused spouse saying they love their abuser.

I can’t love a country that starts stupid and inhumane wars, killing thousands of innocents and indirectly causing the deaths and suffering of millions more.

I can’t love a country that takes healthcare away from millions of people and uses that money to enrich their pals in the Trump-Epstein class.

I can’t love a country that sends out masked militias to shoot citizens in the streets, torture our neighbors, and separate families.

I can’t love a country that’s led by a racist, misogynist, xenophobic tyrant.

And let me just say it: I can’t love a country that’s led by Donald Trump and his sycophant Congress.

[Lyn🦋 @_ayandamay]

I want a refund on every minute I spent in 8th grade learning that monopolies are illegal and that our government would protect us from greedy men....

[fresh @fauxfresh]

couldn’t tell you nothing about this show other than i loved it

[𝓔𝓶 ♡ @emkenobi]

All this man does is kill and destroy.

[ꪻꪖꪀᧁﺃꫀ♡ @MJThrillsHer]

You can just see the pure lack of aura

[HEEDlE @Heyheedie]

wasn’t planning on listening to that shit anyways

[The Anonymous Nobody @el_budget]

Hold on man, Akademiks been eating dick all these years and never met him?

[Rosaaaaaaa 🍰🍩 @rirukalover]

When she asks me why it's so small so I gotta explain to her I'm a hantavirus survivor

[Hassan Mafi ‏ @thatdayin1992]

It's literally capitalism

[͏b͏l͏a͏n͏c @dqveed]

because they did the same thing to black kids in the sixties when segregation ended

[͏b͏l͏a͏n͏c @dqveed]

The Christian conservative mind cannot fathom someone being simultaneously religious and not hateful

[choppa 🛝 @choppaslide]

She got under that nigga skin INSTANTLY dawg im crying