wide & sassy

insufferable

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

if you wanna see me at my lowest make me do Bulgarian split squats

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

happy pride to every gay except the man who gave me strep at the 🦅

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

sent a sext and got a video of his dog in return 😭😭😭

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

The human body is wild like wdym my new belly button has to be filled to prevent it from closing itself 🤯

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

I have never watched paw patrol but I can only imagine that there’s an overweight, grumpy dog that wasn’t good enough to become another first responder and thus represents ICE in the paw patrol universe

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

@trader_tony_ more than anything tbh

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

Them: is that the—
Me: the Chili’s January 6th commemorative margarita? Yes, it is

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

gonna start messaging guys on grindr by just saying “would”

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

Every time I watch heated rivalry I have to j*rk off

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

one of my neighbors is constantly trying to catfish me as a 24 yo bi man :/

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

One thing about me is that I love to get 2 on

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

need to marry Conan gray

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

b*tthole surgery is a fate I wish on no one

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

getting skinny enough that I want to start wearing oversized clothes 💅

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

instead of listing “⬇️ for compatibility” maybe you should just grow up and learn how to top occasionally

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

doctor told me I was so tight 👁️🫦👁️

[tia ★ @tiadeeznuts]

not my circus but admittedly those ARE my monkeys

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

free Palestine? Buddy, you’re gonna have to pay for that

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

what about 6 inches and likely to inherit significant generational wealth 😏🤪

[Jag @JagerWatson]

How about 8 inches and gainfully employed

[wide & sassy @wideandsassy]

The peek at the bush 🤩

[Film Updates @FilmUpdates]

Jamie Dornan for the latest Diet Coke campaign.