Cole Workman

Son, Scorpio,Walking ashtray

[myriam @thegrandame]

having crackas and a diet coke

[pratham @prath4m]

I could never write a suicide note I’d try to make it funny

[Papa Woof und Krampus und Bleaken @woofknight]

Apparently, “Morning, bitches” is not considered a “team-oriented greeting” at work.

[Skurt Vonnegut @ThisLocalHater]

Can't wait to get really old and drive my car into the side of a Dairy Queen

[CHANEL MURDER @ChanelMurder]

“girl fuck you” is gender neutral

[Brian @WeActuallyDidIt]

i can’t believe they cut this from the devil wears prada 2 😤

[tt✮⋆ @Bluebirdeyessss]

i love being in STEM (shenanigans, tomfoolery, escapades, and mischief)

[S.🎧 @1ssve]

"Oh for fuck's sake what now" - me when asked to do the job I was hired to do

[Danny Polishchuk @Dannyjokes]

I ask for Coke and they tell me they don’t have any

[clancy🫧🦪 @upperuplandz]

Mount Rushmore if it slayed

[Tom Smyth @Tom_Smyth_]

ban it from showing the people i went to high school with what they’d look like as a cartoon character too while you’re at it

[Maci 🐞 @WisteriaRising]

GOD I love women

[sid 🌹🔆🇨🇦 @lilbabygandhi]

Right to bear arms but if you do then 6 retarded high school dropouts will shoot you dead

[evan loves worf @esjesjesj]

WATER WET, NOT DRY — STUDY FINDINGS

[bald ann dowd @ali_sivi]

what i looked like in 2016 is between me and god

[🍋 @lemoncarcass]

me when they outlaw having a fat ass and a pure heart

[Betches @betchesluvthis]

"can I be mean for a second?"

me:

[Haters_gonna_hate @princess_kim_k]

I wish a foreign country would come and capture Trump in the middle of the night.