ɐssıɹɐɔ

I can’t keep track of all my socks.

[Hustlanani @hustlanani]

Talk to me like you respect both of our nervous systems

[cuckold jones @cuckcat]

“2 likes isn’t a lot” imagine two cats meowing

[chinapoet @ideafucker]

they forced rowley to eat the moldy cheese that’s why i keep a blade on me

[DIMES @Diimees_]

I be hittin that mf roundabout so hard I be ina passenger seat

[Profesora @Profesora0]

I remember when I lost my job and I looked at myself in the mirror after crying and said “Steve jobless” and I started laughing so hard I cried some more

[taylor garron @taylorgarron]

“i can see your nipples through your shirt” ok well i can see the hurt child within you despite all you do to try and cover it up

[Fred Figglehorn @mirbartierr]

When shorty ask u “What did u eat today?” And u gotta lie cuz u ate
12 icecream sandwiches

[miilad @mladamri]

they paint you with the colors they have

[lola @straykttn]

ever since i was a little girl i knew i was a morbid little freak

[álex ✷ @evilwrin]

aquela fase maldita de pré menstruação onde você tem belos seios e uma mente perturbada

[girl with many prospects @harryscowgirI]

when it’s time to eat the rich and harry’s thighs are on the menu

[L 🍉 @verynormalgf]

smoking the weed that makes me pet the fuck out of my cat

[Debbie Downer @ANGELBABYBITTY]

hiii I found a strand of ur hair in my bed did u want me to come drop it off Lol

[aurora @babyy]

being in love is so fun every day i’m like yayyy

[swana ִֶָ🦢࣪☾. @farnnesse]

Love it when my bf puts all his weight on me. I feel like a pressed flower in a book

[r @_rzua]

was what we had real or cake

[nalox @nafoxone]

Drinking with your parents is dangerous cuz me and my brother just told our parents we’ve done molly before

[💎 @foreeeeeal]

my boyfriend is ABSOLUTELY REFUSING to do this sex position where he sits at the piano and plays a song about me and i lie on the bed and shed a single perfect tear

[rosie 💋🪩 @babyhcney]

the comments are frying me