incorrect obey me!

totally 100% correct quotes from #obeyme

[incorrect obey me! @wrongobeyme]

⚡️ “awesome art by awesome people”

https://t.co/iYKHlxoMim

[incorrect obey me! @wrongobeyme]

mc: [pours salt in coffee and gives it to beel as a dare] drink this

beel: oh uh, thanks

beel: [drinks the whole cup]

mc: [nervously] uh didn’t it… taste weird to you?

beel: yeah, but i didn’t want to hurt your feelings, so i drank it all

mc: [tearing up] o-oh, okay

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cop: you're going to prison for forgery

mammon *slides him a 37 dollar bill* what about now

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lucifer: what do you think?

asmo: do you actually want my opinion, or do you just want me to agree with you?

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mammon: sometimes, i don’t realize an event was traumatic until i tell it as a funny story and notice everyone is staring at me weird.

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belphie: the hardest i work is when i’m figuring out how to get out of doing work

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lucifer: i tried to write ‘i’m a functional adult’ but my phone changed it to 'fictional adult’ and i feel like that’s more accurate.

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satan: i wasn't listening, but i strongly disagree with whatever lucifer proposed.

belphie: *sleeptalking* same!

[submitted by @CaithyLynn]

[incorrect obey me! @wrongobeyme]

mammon: s-so what? i made one mistake, big deal!

lucifer:...see, mammon, the problem is... your mistakes are not that rare.

belphie: yeah. since your entire existence is a mistake and all.

[submitted by @CaithyLynn]

[incorrect obey me! @wrongobeyme]

satan: think fast!

belphie: die young!

asmo: leave a sexy corpse!

[submitted by @CaithyLynn]

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belphie: i want to wake up with you for the rest of your life, mc.

mc: i wake up at like 6:00 am.

belphie: okay, nevermind then.

[submitted by @CaithyLynn]

[incorrect obey me! @wrongobeyme]

beel: the quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach.

asmo: the quickest way to a man's heart is you on your knees.

belphie: the quickest way to a man's heart is through the fourth and fifth ribs.

[submitted by @CaithyLynn]

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mammon: i hate when levi says, "are you even listening to me?"

mammon: it's such a random way to start a conversation...

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satan: mammon, you think every round fruit is an apple

mammon: no, i don’t.

satan: ok, what are these? *holds up cherries*

mammon: tiny apples

satan: and those? *points at pumpkins*

mammon: halloween apples

satan: *throws the pumpkin at him*

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solomon: you rank your friends by their appearance?

asmo: calm down, 12.

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lucifer: can you do something for me?

mammon: of course.

lucifer: ...and can you do a good job on it?

mammon: whoa, whoa, whoa, you're changing the whole deal here!

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beel: why is satan crying in the corner?

asmo: he took one of those “which demon brother are you” quizzes.

beel: so, who’d he get?

asmo: lucifer.

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mammon: *runs into a glass door and knocks himself out*

mc: *turns around and walks away fast*

solomon: isn't that your boyfriend?

mc: SHHHH lower your voice!!

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mc: hey lucifer, could you do me a small favor?

lucifer: i would literally kill for you, but go on.

[Kitty Art @Supermewkitty]

Solomon's cooking is getting out of hand! 🔥🔥🔥

For the last Solomon Saturday of #obeytober

@wrongobeyme @Correctobeyme #obeyme #obeymesolomon #obeymefanart #obeymemasters

[incorrect obey me! @wrongobeyme]

asmo: so i'm thinking a spring wedding, or maybe a summer wedding. i don't want it to be too cold

mc: what are you talking about??!? we're not even engaged

asmo:

asmo: so THAT'S what i forgot to do last night

[submitted by @colettesapotato]