Indian!

Response. Unfiltered. Earthling. Unapologetic Hindu!

[Indian! @xanrav]

1-7435-8668-0038-6476-191

[Indian! @xanrav]

@Benarasiyaa Global IT:

[Indian! @xanrav]

@theskindoctor13 Bharat k Janta!

Reel > Child wellness

[Anurag @anuragteewari]

Here is the first episode of my new IP series, PRAKASH BHARATI.

Our first bulletin crossed 300K views on Instagram in under 12 hours.

A fictional 80s-style Indian news network reporting on things that feel a little too familiar.

#PrakashBharati #Satire #aifilm #IndianTelevision #80sAesthetic #80sTrend

[Indian! @xanrav]

@PandaGallery_ Enable date and time stamp. Good job :)

[Sonica @PandaGallery_]

I need a new phone to shoot photos and videos of poor infrastructure, open potholes, irresponsible people, neglected roads, broken drainage and civic issues.

Gurgaon, I’m documenting everything now. 😭

[Indian! @xanrav]

@himantabiswa Tab tu comgress mein thaa

[Indian! @xanrav]

Just in: World Olympics is calling Pradhan Sevak and their minister to participate in ‘Fhenko Jitna Hau sake’ contest. Trump and Paki PM already filed their names

[Indian! @xanrav]

@navikakumar

[Gems @gemsofbabus_]

> Be a BJP Minister
> Wake up
> Send your kids abroad to study
> Share Modi’s Aurafarm edits
> Retweet Modi’s tweet
> Say nothing about current issues
> Compare India with Pak & Bangladesh
> Sleep

[Gems @gemsofbabus_]

> Be a BJP Minister
> Wake up
> Send your kids abroad to study
> Share Modi’s Aurafarm edits
> Retweet Modi’s tweet
> Say nothing about current issues
> Compare India with Pak & Bangladesh
> Sleep

[Indian! @xanrav]

@hvgoenka You called that a job?

[Indian! @xanrav]

@Fact_Check1990 @NalinisKitchen Awareness? His job is to ban such misleading products.

For awareness we have tons of peanut size BJP trolls!

[Indian! @xanrav]

@rishibagree World-class infrastructure!

I will tag every Pro BJP who will write world class infrastructure next time. Starting with Bagree!

[Priyanka Kakkar @PKakkar_]

Safdarjung hospital is a premier health care institute in the country. It invites the best in healthcare, but look how the Central Govt treats our brightest minds.

Doctors work long shifts and then go to sleep in these deplorable staff quarters & then the govt charges them 18K-20K for this junk.

After Satya Niketan, are we waiting for another tragedy?

BJPs failure to ensure basic safety is putting lives at risk.

[Indian! @xanrav]

@AmitShah I hate to say this but the BJP will not come back next time

[Indian! @xanrav]

@rishibagree Bus kar!

Flyover does not mean we have world class infra!

[Rakesh Krishnan Simha @ByRakeshSimha]

Lutyens Delhi: The 3,000-acre country that gets free bungalows to explain why India is poor. It's a long satire, but you will want to read every bit written down here.
- via Facebook

1/2

For a farmer in Yavatmal, Lutyens is just that place in Delhi where Google Maps says "road closed due to dharna." For a techie in Indiranagar, it's that part of Delhi where one month's rent is more than his CTC. For a fisherman in Kochi, Lutyens is just a spelling mistake he autocorrects to "Lutien's".

Lutyens Delhi is not a locality. It is a sovereign nation inside a nation. About 3,000 acres designed by Sir Edwin Lutyens, a British architect hired to build an imperial capital that would last a thousand years. He designed wide roads so that viceroys could see revolts coming from far. He did not imagine that one day the most vocal critics of imperialism would live in his bungalows and write 1200-word columns against imperialism from imperial lawns.

There are roughly 1000 bungalows. Each bungalow is bigger than the panchayat office, primary school, ration shop and PHC of an average Indian village combined. Each bungalow has a Type VII building, Type VIII garden, Type IX entitlement and Type XI sense of entitlement. The house is allotted by the Government of India, maintained free by CPWD, painted free every year, guarded by Delhi Police, garden maintained by 4 malis, but the occupant will write a passionate op-ed on how India must end VIP culture.

The residents are called Lutyens' people. They don't live in Delhi, they inhabit it. Like a species that found a perfect ecosystem and never left. Their Aadhaar may say Delhi, but their mental address is somewhere between London School of Economics and Khan Market.

Their life cycle is fixed and beautifully choreographed. Children born in Sir Ganga Ram Hospital, schooling in American Embassy School or Sardar Patel Vidyalaya, college in St Stephen's, Masters in JNU or Oxford on a government scholarship meant for marginalized students, internship at an NGO on Shahjahan Road with a name like Centre for Equity and Justice, first job as "young leader" at a think tank funded by Ford Foundation, first book launch at India International Centre, and then lifetime employment as expert on everything Indian without ever traveling in Indian Railways general compartment or eating at a dhaba without doing a story on it.

Their day is ritualistic. Morning starts with The Hindu editorial page and a deep frown that India is not what it should be. By 11 am they are at Khan Market buying imported cheese worth Rs 1800 and complaining about rising inequality in India. Afternoon is a closed-door briefing where a former bureaucrat explains why India is failing. Evening is a panel discussion at Habitat Centre on "Is India Intolerant?" with the same five panelists who have been discussing the same question since 2004, with the same answer.

Night ends with a tweet about the death of democracy typed from a lawn that has more staff than the staff quarters of ISRO. The tweet gets 200 likes from the same 200 people who live within 2 km radius. That is called national discourse.

Their economics is fascinating and should be taught at LSE. Inflation for them is not onion at Rs 70. For them onion is not a vegetable, it is a metaphor for majoritarian fascism. They discovered onion only once in 1980 when Indira Gandhi used Rs 5/kg onion to win an election. After that they never went to a mandi. Their real inflation is when Sula red moves from Rs 2800 to Rs 3200, or when the Delhi Gymkhana membership waitlist goes from 28 years to 32 years, or when the CPWD takes 48 hours instead of 24 to fix the AC.

[Indian! @xanrav]

@RShivshankar ROFL :)

I dare you to publish the list and its owners!

Dubba band hau jayega tumhara!

[Indian! @xanrav]

@Cockroach4India This is Vikas on the shoulder of çommon men :)

Don't you see the 1 lakh price tag shoes he is wearing!

[Indian! @xanrav]

@Ankita__19 Strange? How does she call herself a journalist unless her definition of Delhi is India Gate?