i lied, i didn't go to sleep. i actually stayed up all night with tears rolling down my face wondering why i'm never good enough for anyone and what i did to deserve all this.
The second you mention suicidal thoughts to any doctor:
"DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAPLAN?DOYOUHAVEAP-"