amy

[Sarah @sarahoftherings]

my brain when i’m hormonal and overstimulated

[amy @xcviamy]

Waiting patiently for the music video to come out for I Had Some Help 🙂 @PostMalone @MorganWallen

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

My husband has started whispering "Time for tubby custard" just before he orgasms. I don't know how much longer I can stay with him.

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

I once dated a girl with slightly prominent front teeth. Making plans to hook up one night I texted her 'see you later honey'. Predictive text changed it to 'see you later goofy'. Pressed send before realising. Never heard from her again.

[amy @xcviamy]

@NoContextBrits Honey I Wank the Kids

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

I once tried to flick away a large fly which was on a strangers shoulder whilst at the beach. Turns out it was a mole and the guy just stared at me.

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

When I go on a date with a woman and she turns out to be a bellend, I'll still offer to pay for dinner but use the spare card I know will get declined. A bigot bought me my last curry.

[amy @xcviamy]

If you could he half human and half animal, what animal would you be? (Bottom half) #GeorgeGetWellSoonYouStud

[amy @xcviamy]

#GeorgeGetWellSoonYouStud show us your balls

[amy @xcviamy]

@ImAllexx

[amy @xcviamy]

@ImAllexx

[amy @xcviamy]

@Memeulous I once waiting in a&e for over 6 hours, I asked if I would be seen soon and they said they had called my name a few hours ago but I "didn't answer to my name" so they moved on ..... I hadn't moved from my seat .

[amy @xcviamy]

@Memeulous Fucking slap it

[amy @xcviamy]

@Memeulous 10/10 looking forward to it m8

[cats being weird little guys 👅 @weirdlilguys]

this is my emotional support wall

[amy @xcviamy]

@Memeulous @JamesMarriottYT Barbie movies ?

[kira 👾 @kirawontmiss]

“i’m allergic to cats” bro grow tf up

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

This is Weller. He picked this flower for you. He also may have eaten a few of them. Not this one though. This one was special. 12/10 we are honored Weller