husband: “Except they’re less ugly & more reliable.”
me: unless you get them wet!
Then they’re like gremlins. They’ll turn on you and try to kill you.
#teslas@elonmusk
On a scale of how tired I look:
Me: I'll have some water and a coffee please
Waiter: Sure thing! Long weekend?
Me: Eh. You could say that.
Waiter: No sleep last night?
Me: Yea, no not really
Waiter: OH are we trying to sober up?
Me: *haven't had a drink in weeks
*laughs nervously