石原範子

i do stuff

[石原範子 @yesriko]

My cat licks me awake if her food bowl is empty. I think it is a threat

[石原範子 @yesriko]

Ran out to the carport this morning with no pants on. The dog in the street didn't see me but the guy walking the dog *definitely* did not see me

[石原範子 @yesriko]

@Odessa048 At the Spaghetty Townhouse

[石原範子 @yesriko]

Ted has now told me the same story a third time. He had no idea

[石原範子 @yesriko]

Ted has surpassed the slight slurring stage of drunkenness. He is at the bad-moves dancing stage.

[石原範子 @yesriko]

I used to think wall-to-wall carpeting meant carpet on the wall. It should be a thing

[石原範子 @yesriko]

A DJ may save a life but a DJ can also make me go homicidal

[石原範子 @yesriko]

If teleporters were real: "Sorry I can't make it to your wedding, I'm gonna be in...India" "C'mon! You can teleport for just a daaay"

[石原範子 @yesriko]

Things I made and ate today. Ginger pork bowl and bagel sandwich with egg, avocado, cucumber,… https://t.co/67cOOXOphG

[石原範子 @yesriko]

I just learned that "snowflake" is an insult. So what is a non-snowflake person called?

[石原範子 @yesriko]

What a great day to go outside and smell the pollen #seasonalallergies

[石原範子 @yesriko]

@Odessa048 you are the man cold. The man cold is you

[石原範子 @yesriko]

@Odessa048 it's when you don't push through your cold and let your cold be your only priority

[石原範子 @yesriko]

Man cold was not fun. Must find new hobby.

[石原範子 @yesriko]

Next new hobby might be man-colding

[石原範子 @yesriko]

I've picked up a fun, new hobby: mansplaining. It's when I explain in detail what the listener already knows.

[石原範子 @yesriko]

Really? Really.: Ga. Bill Would Put "Noncitizen" On Certain Driver's Licenses https://t.co/fHkg7Pitzj

[石原範子 @yesriko]

I am not a productive member of this household. I must be turning into a cat

[石原範子 @yesriko]

If I smell your cologne while I'm on my bike going 85+ mph, you may have put too much on.

[石原範子 @yesriko]

Political season is the worst because of the political commercials #LowestUnitRate #FunnyOnlyToMe