Zoe Cooper

[Kafka, Esq. 🧌 @metalgearobama]

“Have you seen” yes. Yes I have. I am on the internet constantly like everyone else. I have seen it. My screen time has been 8 hours a day every year since like 2007. It’s not good. I have seen it. We don’t need to talk about internet shit. How are your kids

[dr. z, esq. @zeynepmyenisey]

Being on your laptop outside is a miserable experience and im tired of people pretending it's not

[tia ★ @tiadeeznuts]

not my circus but admittedly those ARE my monkeys

[RealHousewivesRanked! @RankedReal]

Do I hate watch this every single week? Yes.
Am I absolutely devastated it’s been cancelled? Also Yes.
#AndJustLikeThat

[kelly @BoyYeetsWorld]

Uh yeah, I’m having a pretty good day

[grace 🤝 @debtbarbie]

“listen to your body” ok well my body wants to lay down and eat snacks 14 hours a day

[mama(to-be) strawberry 🍼🍓 @honeybunwife]

this + doordash food from someplace local + watching a mediocre movie from 2011 on cable

[nazzo @nazzobetweeting]

from the yankee game today

[marley ❤️‍🔥 @marleyharper]

homesick

[AARON @lidolmix]

this is like the most annoying trait someone could have, and you guys need to unlearn it

[ally 🦋✨🎧⸆⸉ @ally_sheehan]

i don't care who wins or loses today my biggest hope is that everyone has fun and taylor swift ruins the day of men who hate her

[expert bimbologist™️ @bimbologymajor]

If I became a bird, I wouldn’t be able to tell anyone but there would be signs

[Liam Fennessy @LiamFennessy_]

When I offer to cover the tab for my friends (I want the Amex points and they’re Venmo’ing me later)

[REESE HAVOC ✨ @reesehavocnyc]

At Wicked on Broadway and they just made an announcement before the show that despite the TikTok ban they are performing the show as written

[tori 🪩🥂🍒 @bensonscully]

me at the ripe age of 26 urban dictionarying a slang term i don’t know