zoe!! 

locking in with a satisfying *click*

[Thing Bad @Merman_Melville]

Being a billionaire must be insane. You can buy new teeth, new skin. All your chairs cost 20,000 dollars and weigh 2,000 pounds. Your life is just a series of your own preferences. In terms of cognitive impairment it's probably like being kicked in the head by a horse every day

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

just found some more in my drafts, so

Peculiar Phrases Vol 2:
Popcorn for my Cop Porn
Covenant Government
Hairy Man Makes Merry Pancakes
Taking Bong Rips from your Mom's Nips
Braxton's Waxed Buns
Mister Miyagi's a Fan of Usagi's
Mister Sakaguchi's Mystery Stock of Coochies

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

Peculiar Phrases Vol. 1:
-"the top parts of pop tarts"
-bardock's hard cock
-jellybeans & belly jeans
-bojack's go-backs
-"fucked hard in the front yard"

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

*Mister Miyagi's A Fan Of Wasabi

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

Peculiar Phrases Vol. 1:
-"the top parts of pop tarts"
-bardock's hard cock
-jellybeans & belly jeans
-bojack's go-backs
-"fucked hard in the front yard"

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

just found some more in my drafts, so

Peculiar Phrases Vol 2:
Popcorn for my Cop Porn
Covenant Government
Hairy Man Makes Merry Pancakes
Taking Bong Rips from your Mom's Nips
Braxton's Waxed Buns
Mister Miyagi's a Fan of Usagi's
Mister Sakaguchi's Mystery Stock of Coochies

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

spank bank in the think tank

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

@hecubian_devil i'd have to do stuff i'm not morally ok with to be successful anyways

[jake rhodes @jakebrodes]

It must have felt so incredible to be a white boy and drive around Miami in a Camaro coked out of your mind piss drunk listening to this album 10 bricks on the trunk chopper in the back but it’s cool bc they’re CIA bricks and it’s a DEA chopper

[jax @brokeurtooth]

a helicopter & six cop cars r surrounding my street & i walked out of my apartment to get my laundry downstairs & three cops yelled “get back inside” & i said “i need to get my laundry” & they yelled “u can get it later” but like what if i get lazy later and don’t want to do it

[Video Nasties🇵🇲 @53gaDr3amca5t]

Not to play down the horrors & violence of the Western Front of WWII, but it is always funny seeing just how people almost universally would rather fight there than the Pacific
Like do you wanna get smooched by pretty Dutch ladies or do you wanna knifefight on Malaria Rape Atoll

[caroline :) @soonrightaway]

baseball is an outdated pick for America’s “national pastime” tbh. if we were honest it would be “jacking off” instead

[doctor idk @bigmonkeong]

holy 2001 mog

[Grace @gracecamille_]

“your problems are all in your head” well yes. do you see how that i find that an especially troubling place for them to be

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

@idiotbraingf im bad at guessing letters but almost certain i waNt this to happen to me

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

@pissvortex @concept8192 @draintedak literally does not matter as long as he posts good

[Gwen ☕ @GwenpostingTTV]

"You run like a girl."
"[Deadname] is gay I just can't prove it."
"Why do you write like a girl?"
"Why are you sitting on the ground like a girl?"
"Don't hold your drink like a girl, hold it like this."

*transitions*

What the fuck is wrong with you? Don't you realize that y

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

@Lovestospoog3 @DomainDead scary...!!

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

@Lovestospoog3 @DomainDead lol what?

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

@moriaken @suchnerve @victryena @0xadot saying this w no link

[zoe!!  @zoemoding]

he said:

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

@0xadot I don’t know dude but you didn’t have to watch it.

[hope hopes hoping @hopes_revenge]

im nice to women because i also know what it’s like to be talked into anal