Zoomer Philosophy

Philosophies of a Zoomer.

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

I am a modern day philosopher. I will quarrel the meanings of life and existence down to their bare minimums. Did you know toasters are afraid of rocks? It's because of the electrical frequency charge of the rock's aurora.

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Eat your greens

[Miranda Cosgrove @MirandaCosgrove]

https://t.co/KpijApVGPc

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

One who waits for the break of dawn is the very same who dislikes big chungus memes.

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Prolapse implies there's a conlapse

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

I am having an organism.

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Commit adultery with elmo and count chocula

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Be the first to sodomize

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Lights are just the sun but msol

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

If God doesn't exist, then why don't I have Pokemon Yellow for the Nintendo Gameboy Color?

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

@klatskibun Be the first to shit twelve rocks

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

THIS PERSON NEEDS TO LET THEIR LARGE INTESTINE DRIFT INTO THE VAST SEA OF SPACE

[klatski (derg/they) @klatskiklat]

@sproutpubby yes, cus there's scientific proof they can consent

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Dr phal, let her live her life as she wants to live it to seek pure happenis she do what she want!!1
You are but an electrician, not a doctor, dr phal.

[The Dr. Phil Show @TheDrPhilShow]

Tomorrow: Shannon says for the past four years, she’s been raising her two young grandchildren while her daughter, Ginger, has been running the streets, drinking, and doing drugs.
Full story: https://t.co/vX9iXZC2bi

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

I have just been diagnose with ca roomba virus. I am happy.

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

The search for true happeniss lies within will smith space men,

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

@klatskibun Respect? You call me acknowledging that the human race can have evil, degenerate, pieces of shit like you, respect?

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Day #23 of being Jeff Goldblum:

I feel nothing.

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Thread for those blocked

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Where are all the sportsman, who always pulled a rope

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

You know you have one when you're eating away at your soul

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Be glad your big toe is twitching to the sound of a pillow scratching against a the moon.

[Zoomer Philosophy @zoomphilosophy]

Puzzlement is the emotion of a homosexual trashman.