1SockMonkey

Misplaced Texan. Enjoy photography, cooking, and amateur radio. Conservative Christian. #ITM

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

Want to know how to be saved? Here's the plan of salvation, how to go to Heaven... also known as the Gospel:

https://t.co/cebmNahlqz

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@PrimeVideo This was a fun series.

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@Wildcatbn73 @adamcurry Unfortunately, there is a lot of truth to this statement.

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@vicmignogna First met Vic on a flight from Atlanta to Houston a long time ago in a galaxy far away. He told me about his website which he was very excited about called https://t.co/jqarlfv52M it's still up and available to explore. You should check it out!

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@Digital_n11

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@wvfunnyguy Bogative!

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

I recall watching this at the MSC (Memorial Student Center) theater before another movie started back in 1978 when I was attending Texas A&M. It is hilarious still.

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@THErealDVORAK So happy to hear this. #PrayerWorks

[🇨🇭🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿InLucysHead🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇨🇭© @InsideLucysHead]

BBC announcement

From the BBC - Read by #JohnCleese.

ANNOUNCEMENT

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have therefore raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.”

Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.”

The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the Blitz in 1940, when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorised from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.”

The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s get the Bastards.” They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are “Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France‘s white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country’s military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”

The Germans have increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbour” and “Lose.”

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from “No worries” to “She’ll be alright, Mate.” Three more escalation levels remain: “Crikey!” “I think we’ll need to cancel the barbie this weekend”, and “The barbie is cancelled.” So far, no situation has ever warranted the use of the final escalation level.

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@darrenoneill @THErealDVORAK Oh my. I will definitely be praying for him and his family.

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@adamcurry What a beautiful picture of you two. God bless you both.

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@RobSchneider I'm so sorry to hear about the marriage situation. Just know that I will be praying for you and your happiness. You mean so much to many of us and don't let this get you down. Message me if you need someone to talk and pray with you. God bless.

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@WhiteHouse Except that penguins are in the Southern Hemisphere.

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@OneGalaxyyyy So how'd that work out for you?

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@adamcurry Congratulations!

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@GoldenAgeUnfold I have 2 legs.

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@AntiLeftMemes Rubenesque

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@XRP_Alerts I'm ready for face melting time. I've been holding mine for a time like that. #XRP

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@FlagAndFire 10/10

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@silentblossom_ CUR. Now give me my Benjamin.

[1SockMonkey @1sockmonkey]

@trumplicans2024 We used Vicks, not Vick.