B* in her 30s

Greek girl in America-Coffee, Carbs & True Crime-Bilingual 🇬🇷 🇺🇸 -💍 to my love-

[B* in her 30s @30sbitch]

I ask my coworkers not to talk to me until I’ve had my coffee and then I don’t drink coffee until I get home.

[B* in her 30s @30sbitch]

@EmiMelker I bought a ticket to the moon 🚀🚀🚀

[Nonchalant Charlotte @jellybnbonanza]

My best friend in high school’s mom didn’t speak English well so she would have me call the school for her to report an absence because I could do a Korean accent better than my friend.
The thing is, because the school thought I was her I also called in days she skipped too.

[Forward March @RunOldMan]

Monday mornings are for sex, and by sex I mean jelly donuts and coffee.

[Dawne Richards @dawnerichards]

You know, we were a lot calmer when more people smoked cigarettes. Just sayin'...

[B* in her 30s @30sbitch]

When you go to a wedding dressed a little more casual than the rest of the guests and the couple comments on it. Yo be happy I (kinda) dressed up to come to this circus.

[B* in her 30s @30sbitch]

The dark side of YouTube is those Looped & Extended Versions of the songs we love.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez @AOC]

Ahmaud Arbery was murdered for being Black.

His White assailants were allowed to roam free *for months* after lynching him. They faced no charges, no arrests. Police had video of Ahmaud’s murder the day it happened.

His family deserves justice. Our country deserves answers.

[Nonchalant Charlotte @jellybnbonanza]

When people come to me for advice (which they never do, to be quite honest), I just tell them “The answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind” and let out a stream of rootie toot toots!

[B* in her 30s @30sbitch]

@YaNanous Thanks! Yeah 17 weeks and it’s a baby girl 😍

[B* in her 30s @30sbitch]

I have a 90s playlist on and I can feel the baby moving in my belly. Proud mama

[God @TheTweetOfGod]

You're just all so fucking stupid.

[Forward March @RunOldMan]

I have found that if you wear your headphones and drink a couple of cups of coffee in the mornings it keeps the voices quiet, including your SO's.

[Forward March @RunOldMan]

Lady you're in luck, they now make some fashionable masks to cover up that chin hair.

[Nonchalant Charlotte @jellybnbonanza]

Trying hard not to answer with “you too” after someone says happy birthday to me is my kink.

[Forward March @RunOldMan]

My superpower is overhearing conversations and silently giving them advice.

[B* in her 30s @30sbitch]

I’m so mad I live in this crap country during one of the worst pandemics in the history of humanity. Richest and most powerful country in the world my ass.

[Nonchalant Charlotte @jellybnbonanza]

My daughter has her own recipes cards in my recipe box where she keeps her prize winning two step Chop Suey: “First you chop the suey then you suey the chop.”

[Nonchalant Charlotte @jellybnbonanza]

I’ve been out of society for so long I’m starting to sound like Jodi Foster in Nell, Misses Chickabee.

[Nonchalant Charlotte @jellybnbonanza]

You know you’re Southern when you stay in therapy with the same person even though it’s not really helping because you don’t want to hurt their feelings.