IF I GET DEMENTIA…..
I’d like my family to hang this wish list up on the wall where I live. I want them to remember these things.
1a. Every time you enter the room announce yourself. “Hi Dad - it’s Amanda.”
NEVER ask- Do you know who I am??? That causes anxiety.
• If I get dementia, I want my friends and family to embrace my reality.
• If I think my spouse is still alive, or if I think we’re visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. I’ll be much happier for it.
• If I get dementia, don’t argue with me about what is true for me versus what is true for you.
• If I get dementia, and I am not sure who you are, do not take it personally. My timeline is confusing to me.
• If I get dementia, and can no longer use utensils, do not start feeding me. Instead, switch me to a finger-food diet, and see if I can still feed myself.
• If I get dementia, and I am sad or anxious, hold my hand and listen. Do not tell me that my feelings are unfounded.
• If I get dementia, I don’t want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like the adult that I am.
• If I get dementia, I still want to enjoy the things that I’ve always enjoyed. Help me find a way to exercise, read, and visit with friends.
• If I get dementia, ask me to tell you a story from my past.
• If I get dementia, and I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me.
• If I get dementia, treat me the way that you would want to be treated.
• If I get dementia, make sure that there are plenty of snacks for me in the house. Even now if I don’t eat I get angry, and if I have dementia, I may have trouble explaining what I need.
• If I get dementia, don’t talk about me as if I’m not in the room.
• If I get dementia, don’t feel guilty if you cannot care for me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It’s not your fault, and you’ve done your best. Find someone who can help you, or choose a great new place for me to live. With a bus and activities!!
• If I get dementia, and I live in a dementia care community, please visit me often.
• If I get dementia, don’t act frustrated if I mix up names, events, or places.
Take a deep breath. It’s not my fault.
• If I get dementia, make sure I always have my favorite music playing within earshot.
• If I get dementia, and I like to pick up items and carry them around, help me return those items to their original place.
• If I get dementia, don’t exclude me from parties and family gatherings.
• If I get dementia, know that I still like receiving hugs or handshakes.
• If I get dementia, remember that I am still the person you know and love.”
ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇ in Honor of someone you know or knew who has dementia. In Honor of all those I know and love and lost who are fighting Dementia/Alzheimer’s.
Yes
🧻With the Government shutdown they have cut toilet paper, tampons, and paper towels.
🧻Everyone is now supposed to buy their own supplies on commissary.
🧻A roll of toilet paper is $2.25
🧻I make ~35¢/ hour.
🧻6 hours of work for a roll of TP.
Yaron Lischinsky was the finest friend I’ve ever had, brilliant, kind, and endlessly thoughtful. A devout Christian and a gifted linguist, he spoke German, Hebrew, and Japanese. He was full of curiosity and always brimming with ideas. I don’t think we ever had a conversation that didn’t leave me inspired to write something new.
He loved America. He was excited about the future, about finally visiting Texas, and about the life he and his beloved fiancée were building together. I was supposed to meet her today.
They are both gone. And the loss is immeasurable. The world has lost two extraordinary souls. And I have lost a dear friend who made every moment brighter.