Michael Hilton

Author of the Bobby Robot series @Intensepub; Content-creator @youtini_us; publisher of The Weekly Geek on

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

@elonmusk Genuinely curious: Doesn’t paying for verification deincentivize people who are striving to build large brands on the platform? Almost like taking away a milestone goal?

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

@frankmoe talks about #middlegradebooks, #music, #gardening, and #BreakingNews. Check it: https://t.co/k7gB1J0xnx @Fitzroy_Books

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

@MWStover I read your books to absorb your fantastic prose and inject it into my own writing. It sometimes works. Write more please.

[Metamorphosis Literary Agency 📚 🎥 🌎🎙️🎮 @MetamorphLitAg]

Congratulations @5HourNinja aka Michael Hilton on your publishing deal with @OCMyoungdragons!

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

@JCog_ Do it. You won’t.

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

Hi this is Rachel from dealer services letting you know that your car warranty is expired.

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

Realizing I could’ve beat Conor McGregor if I just waited 4 1/2 minutes.

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

Rain dances are stupid. Just go through a car wash and wait 5 minutes.

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

Seems like a missed opportunity to not call this new wind farm Martha’s Windyard.

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

@AnnaAnnahhh I mean, she’s not wrong

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

@MegDowell @heybrucewright Honestly it would prob be better than some of my stuff you’ve had to edit 😂

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

So now that I’m 30 is this whistle when I breathe through my nose just permanent now or...?

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

You know you’re from Louisiana when you sneeze Tony Chachere’s into your mask.

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

@OwenPye Replica of Paul’s Dynamax Pikachu

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

Is Facebook Memories nothing more than a cringe feed of your past self?

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

Baby books really are like “I am a Bunny” and “Joey Goes to the Bathroom,” as if babies are too dumb to appreciate a well-crafted three act narrative structure and nuanced character arcs.

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

Ya know, as a kid I really thought dry cleaning would be a bigger part of adulthood

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

I wish weekends felt as long as YouTube ads.

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

I’m gonna say it. Hair conditioner is a scam.

[Michael Hilton @5HourNinja]

@jessica_froberg Yeah...