Adam Sharp

1. Writer
2. Obsessed with lists
3. COMMON PEOPLE
4. THE CORRECT ORDER OF BISCUITS
5. THE WHEEL IS SPINNING BUT THE HAMSTER IS DEAD (

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

It’d be foolish of me not to mention here that my next book is called THE WHEEL IS SPINNING BUT THE HAMSTER IS DEAD: A JOURNEY AROUND THE WORLD IN IDIOMS, PROVERBS AND GENERAL NONSENSE. So if you want more idioms like the ones in this thread, please pre-order now (link in my bio)

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

@TheJenAnn Just a brief return for now as still inundated with writing and organising a move back to Australia but I will be back properly at some stage

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

A list of lyrics if all lyrics were as profound as "I got soul, but I'm not a soldier"...

1. I got hips, but I’m not a hipster
2. I got plums, but I’m not a plumber
3. I got toes, but I’m not a toaster
4. I got badge, but I’m not a badger
5. I got meow, but I'm not a homeowner

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

@mumShield Thank you! I might just be back fleetingly as still very busy with real-life stuff (writing and moving back to Australia for a while, mostly) but will be back to the regular posts at some point

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

@fotosbysal I got hooves, but I’m not a hoover
I got knees, but I'm not an anaesthetist

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

I've been offline for a few months but I had to return to post those important lists about The Killers because “All These Things That I’ve Done” was released on this day in 2004 (22 years ago!)

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

A list of lyrics by The Killers (if they were really into geography)…

1. I got Seoul, but I’m not a Seouldier
2. I got stones, but I’m not Estonia
3. I got goals, but I’m not Angola
4. I got choice, but I’m not AndOrra
5. I got a mam, but I’m not Mamungkukumpurangkuntjunya

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

@malmesburyman The Book of Daniel - E.L. Doctorow
Plainsong - Kent Haruf
Circe - Madeline Miller
Lincoln in the Bardo - George Saunders
Sombrero Fallout - Richard Brautigan
We Have Always Lived in the Castle - Shirley Jackson
Dreams from Bunker Hill - John Fante
Lonesome Dove - Larry McMurtry

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

At a divorce paper signing…

WOMAN: I regret ever joining that Star Wars dating app
MAN: You were looking for love in Alderaan places
WOMAN: And I really regret marrying a Star Wars pun addict
MAN: It was a wookie mistake
WOMAN: Just sign it
MAN, SIGNING: May divorce be with you

[Sal 📸🇬🇧🇳🇿🎞 @fotosbysal]

@AdamCSharp My dad used to say, “I’ll never let you down”
Great man, terrible hot air balloon pilot

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

@_Am0H My dad always used to say, “don’t screw up.”
Lovely guy, terrible carpenter.

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

My dad used to say “always get up early so you can beat the morning crowds.”
Nice man, overzealous riot police officer.

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

@SimonCharleswo1 My sister used to say “you don’t always have to take the lead.” Her dog walking business didn’t last long.

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

@fotosbysal My dad used to say, “I promise there are no strings attached.”
Great man, terrible bungee jump operator.

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

My older brother used to say “you should always try to be upfront with everyone.”
Lovely guy, terrible goalkeeping coach.

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

My grandfather always used to say “you should answer to no one.”
Lovely man, terrible switchboard operator.

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

My grandmother always used to say “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.”
Brilliant woman, terrible surgeon.

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

My uncle always used to say “the first rule of theatre is to leave them wanting more.”
Fabulous guy, terrible anaesthetist.

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

My dad always used to say “when you’re in a hole, stop digging.”
Lovely man, terrible archaeologist.

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

@njissawrites @TheCinesthetic I've had a couple of conversations on here about it over the years but never actually met anyone in real life who has seen it

[Adam Sharp @AdamCSharp]

@ayotarun And earlier...