🍵🐸

[Brian Wecht @bwecht]

Audrey (5yo): Daddy, I only like it when mommy wakes me up in the morning.
Me: Why?
Audrey: She’s a girl. She’s pretty.
Me: I’m not pretty?
Audrey: *thinks for a few seconds* Maybe a little?

[Jordyn @jordelizabeth17]

One of my favorite things I heard today. “Bill, how come every time you come over here you have triscuits? No dip, no cheese, just triscuits. It’s like eating cereal with no milk, it’s like eating dry wood” -@Zak_Bagans from ghost adventures

[Taylor Nicole Dean @taylorndean]

just remembered this and searched for it. I was in the tub writing my suicide note, planning to take my life, when he opened the door & stared at me. it distracted me long enough to break down & snap out of it. Just shows you never know what‘s behind people’s social media posts.

[Brian Wecht @bwecht]

Today Audrey (5yo) found a penny, lost it 5 min later, and then started sob-screaming “it meant everything in the world to me”

[Jeffree Star @JeffreeStar]

Hi, I can’t stop crying... How Are Ya?? 🥺😭

[🍵🐸 @AlexAether55]

@emineibadlaeva1 @crosby_ice @zoeabigails @GabbieHanna @sidneyraz Gabbie😂😂

[jimby 🌱☀️ @JimmyWhetzel]

if u have a sugar daddy i salute u get that boomer coin and buy yourself a nintendo switch honey you deserve it

[G @giaamichele]

PSA : if I go missing ; I don’t just do that so someone took my ass cause I always have my phone . Post this on your Twitter ladies just in case.

[Anna Kendrick @AnnaKendrick47]

Holy shit. I just remembered I was in Twilight.

[Lady Gaga @ladygaga]

can u eat too much chinese broccoli

[🍵🐸 @AlexAether55]

James Charles is NOT a child. He is an ADULT and knows right from wrong. Just because he is younger does NOT give him an excuse to be a sexual predator. As far as addressing everything in private, what people don't realize is when you're in the spotlight, FEW THINGS are private.

[TJ @tjsmith]

@h3h3productions He doesn’t know that the fupa is where you store your extra brain cells. He doesn’t stand a chance.

[bbqs @couturebiatch]

Amalfi, Italy

[Anna Kendrick @AnnaKendrick47]

Sweatpants without pockets, you can fuck all the way off.

[gxbriella 🇹🇹✨️ @gabbyxgabz]

Millennials are having a quarter life crisis bc the previous generation fucked the economy to shit, and now we all want to die bc we don't have our own house and car yet, which was fully attainable at a fraction of the cost "in the ole days"

[Zak Bagans 🧛🏻‍♂️ @Zak_Bagans]

Its ok to shock people with your amazing talent when they least expect it #AmericasNextFlopDancer #AmericasGotNoTalent #DancingWithTheIdiot

[Shane Dawson @shanedawson]

THIS IS THE BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE AHHHHHHHHH!!!! THANK U GUYS FOR ALL THE LOVE MY HEART IS LITERALLY GONNA EXPLODE 😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️💥💥💥💥💥💥💥