Alex Nolen

she/her

[Alex Nolen @AlexisNolen]

If there’s an empty row of treadmills and you choose the one right next to me, just know you are the enemy.

[Alex Nolen @AlexisNolen]

@BarstoolBigCat my guy have you ever smiled at a camera normally

[beef clapton: soldier of fortune @thetrompwner]

there needs to be a separate grocery store for people who actually know what they're doing

[Brandon Walker @BFW]

I desperately want sports to make me happy and sports just don’t care.

[sage ☾ @counterfetts]

nobody:

mr. milchick this episode:

#severance

[slime @slimeison]

Do you guys think Claire’s would offer severance procedures

[Book @DevinBook]

Plz don’t go @Hooters

[h @ipodmacbook]

replacing “i don’t know” with “unfortunately the answer would drive you to madness” in all work emails going forward

[Alex Nolen @AlexisNolen]

Wordle 1,290 1/6*

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

The day has finally come

[SIMONE 🩷 @parasocialyte]

Hawk Tuah this Hawk Tuah that why don't you try to Talk Tuah Therapist

[Jordan / sunny 18 @thatgayyybitch]

me everyday since i started listening to chappell roan

[Alex Nolen @AlexisNolen]

I got my parents to sign up for the Malort 5k with me

[Alex Nolen @AlexisNolen]

We ran into our downstairs neighbor and he asked ‘you guys gettin food delivered again?’

[Patty 𓆦 @minasdemon]

Me during a plot twist scene after forcing people to watch a movie

[matt bernstein @mattxiv]

conservatives going to the mall tomorrow

[brian @brianmooran]

nicole from selling sunset this entire season

[Alex Nolen @AlexisNolen]

@BallBlastEm Would love to join the league with either team!

[Aly & AJ @alyandaj]

I’m happy to see that this is still relevant. #wemetathome

[bbqueen @ngocbbuii]

one of the best things about being a little sad is how far you can walk

[𝕯𝖎𝖑𝖉𝖔 𝕭𝖆𝖌𝖌𝖎𝖓𝖘 @EmmaTolkin]

Achingly beautiful and raw performance. I’ll never forget it. 💕