Alma's Matters

#childrensbook by @angiologist about #toddlerlife

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

What’s your name?
How old are you?
My name is Alma,
I am two!

But before you know it,
I'll be three,
and you'll miss these days...
Just wait and see...

#ChildrensBooks #ChildrenPoetry #kidsbooks #AlmasMattersBook #parenting #toddlerlife

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

I’m finishing first grade today. Dad thought I didn’t see him cry. #LastDayofSchool

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

Me: I heard there’s a #TikTok trend daring kids to throw school soap dispensers into the toilet. I hope you’re not doing that, ARE YOU?!

Kid: There’s soap in the school bathroom?

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

D (4): Knock knock…
Me: who’s there…?
D: No one…
Me: No one who?
D: No one loves you…

HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW…

… That definitely stung :/

[Ido Weinberg, MD @Angiologist]

#FathersDay is a great opportunity to learn what your kids really think about you… Share your own. I would love to read! @AlmasMatters

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

A: Dad?
Me: ?
A: Do you think there are invisible giants just moving us around?
Me: … ummm… where’d you here that one?
A: I just thought about it
Me: [jaw drops] @elonmusk #FromTheMouthsOfBabes

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

Alma (5 1/2): Dad, you tell dad jokes
Me: Maybe I tell jokes?
Alma: Nope. Jokes are funny...
Me: :/
@EricSecemskyMD

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

WORD! (And Picture...)

@PamelaPaulNYT

https://t.co/8St2xdgqBL

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

Hey @JetBlue, guess how much I love you? (If you don’t get it - this is little nutbrown hare). And for the record - the kids did this one unsolicited... #childrensbook

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

I think Alma (5) just invented the pain scale:

A: Dad, point to how much it hurts. Fourteen hundred one million?

Me: Pointing. Yes. That’s how much my face hurts after the root canal

10 minutes pass...

Alma: And now? Look. You can choose 10. That’s better! #BrushYourTeeth

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

When you’re 5, two years together is most of the memories you’ve got #BestFriends

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

At bedtime D asks “Will I go to school today?” He means tomorrow.
“Yes”, says his mother.
“And, after today?” This time he means the next day.
“Yes. Then too.”
“And after today?”
“No”, she finally says, “That'll be the weekend. You won't have to go then. You can stay with me.”

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

“The sky looks like a giant painted it” #HowMythologyIsBorn #ToddlerLife

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

“Your hair looks like a dry field”. Out of the mouth of babes... #TruthStings

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

It’s #Halloween2020. Time to become someone or something else... ZOOM IN for the text. Have a great time!

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

How times have changed #AliceInWonderland

[NSN Cycling Team @NSNCyclingTeam]

Family first. @Tomvanasbroeck shows that big time, giving a hug 🤗 to his kids waiting on the side of TOUR OF FLANDERS - for DADDY. The race can wait.

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

Mom: [Buys awesome new yellow @ReebokClassics sneakers]

Alma: Did you outgrow your old ones?

Mom: Umm... No...

#GirlDad #childhoodmemories

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

[Screaming] I AM NOT OUT OF CONTROL

Yup. Classic first step of being out of control...

#GirlDad

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

Dad says that if we ever get a boat we should call it “Anchor Baby” after me and brother. I don’t get it...

[Alma's Matters @AlmasMatters]

Thank you International Jewish Student Center for arranging this Sukkah with the best hashtag ever #shakeitproud #shakeittillyoumakeit #HappySukkot

https://t.co/0MhCzRDiwu