also garrett

super average 41 year old white suburban rap dad

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

give the cops a whistle & a notepad and leave the “protecting and serving” to trained professionals. #AbolishThePolice #ACAB

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

@HVNYrefugee leaning power lines through the field were my only giveaway; left Hokkaido, right TN.

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

@facetedcarapace i think she means at night while sleeping in the car, truckers do the same at truck stops

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

@alex_avoigt @VW don’t listen to this guy. lysm.

[𝕃𝕆ℝ𝔻 𝔻𝕀𝔸ℕ𝔼𝕏𝕀𝕊 👑 @Dianexis]

YALL

[Eoin Gough @epgough]

"Daddy, seriously! Put this online right now. People will be like What! The! Heck!" -6yo

"Did you do it? Did you do it? Did you get a million points?" -still 6yo.

"Can you believe there was a donkey in the playground?" -6yo going to bed on the best day of her life.

[Ashley Reese @offbeatorbit]

Bill Clinton endorsing Cuomo LOL man we really need him to fucking lose. Enough is enough. This NYC mayoral primary NEEDS to be a referendum on the direction of Democratic Party itself, as well as a repudiation of the uninspiring dinosaurs who run it.

[CALL TO ACTIVISM @CalltoActivism]

Oh boy. This shocking unearthed video showing nearly every prominent Republican saying that tariffs are horrible for America and will tank the economy.

Thy were hoping we wouldn’t find it…so don’t RT right now this very second.

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

@realNHGal @DeItaone Penalty for violation of the Logan Act was amended to a fine, no one has ever been convicted under the act. Also, wording suggests its applies to private citizens, not state gov (courts would determine). CA could eat fines and still save money for millions of their constituents.

[morgan sung @morgan_sung]

first "delve" and now the em dash, it's like real yappers can't even pontificate anymore without being accused of being ai

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

@danb3ard nothing fucks like a quarter zip.

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

yeah; that’s basically how it works ‘round here

[KACHI 🎎 @Kachidey4you]

So basically, companies pay Youtube to show ads and we pay Youtube to not show ads

[Noah @goodguyfag]

words cannot describe how happy i am that he didn’t melt into a little puddle of rat

[Assal Rad @AssalRad]

Blinken is a war criminal.

[Free Palestine 🇵🇸 𓂆 @imzpali]

Jesus was Palestinian lol

[Eric Hovagim @EricHovagim]

Geoguessr pro goes Israel on Azerbaijan

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

@WeirdBongs both. regular because they’re chill like that and top hole because they’re goofy like that.

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

he rests his money clip on a velvet bed for ✨nighttime✨

[Glen Matthews @glenpmatthews]

My friend’s money clip. He has a trust fund

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

god i needed someone else to say it first

[Wild Geerters @steinkobbe]

Who the fuck was asking for Twitter to start immediately autoplaying a random video after the video you meant to watch ends. Every new change on this platform is dumber than the last

[also garrett @AlsoGarrett]

please do not besmirch the Chrysler Pacifica

[maya 🦭 @mayaisfiya]

is this a skill issue? yes of course i’m an idiot. but i think a car manufacturer should design with the stupidest among us in mind because it’s not just smart people that drive cars! in fact it’s mostly not