AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom)

Former Ambassador to Wyoming. Former Ayatollah, Pizza Hut Franchisee, Bennigan's Proprietor

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

Hotdogs when I walk into a Gate station

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@jagsdrew @tiredofthemall Got his ass

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@JohnKiriakou Which book of yours covers extensively the group 17 of November and the Stephen Saunders assassination?

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

America just lost to the Jacksonville Jaguars

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

The Jaguars doubled their wins today. Let's see if they can double them again next week!

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@tealtalk Had they taken the crane down, the project would have only come under budget by 15%. Think of the shareholders before posting nonsense like this.

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@JagsChef That's a lot closer than I thought. Glad yall are okay

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@achybreakybun This is just as DISRESPECTFUL as your tweet regarding Chester Bennington!

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

#PrayersUp

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

I'm going to start referring to murder as a post-term abortion.

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

My dick size is yet another adverse effect of strinkflation

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

Maybe instead of one old guy we elect three kids pretending to be an adult?

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@duvalsoll I'm still alive, brother

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@jagdrummer @jagsdrew And he forgot 9/11!

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

"And Ian, that is why I oppose teenage alcoholism is all it's forms" - Landon Donovan

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@ryaneatscake @GAAPagool I would've thought it was his son Ziggy who crashed the barge into the bridge if he weren't in prison

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@GAAPagool @ryaneatscake Else I would bring the average down

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@jagsdrew @ThatGuyEdub That's not a bad deal

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

@achybreakybun I will try that AND I WILL NOT DIE EVER

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

This is what happens when you don't dredge the harbor

[AmbassadorTom (Parody of AmbassadorTom) @AmbassadorTom]

The Baltimore Bridge collapse would have never happened under Frank Sobotka's union leadership